Jim Flanigan Looks at the World
Turning the Mundane into Fundane Since 2015
I think Donald Trump may be due for a “Marley moment” this Christmas Eve, and I’m talking about Jacob Marley, not Bob Marley, although a Bob Marley moment might do Trump some good, too.
I saw this pic and can definitely see the Jacob Marley moment coming.
Don’t notice anything unusual other than a reality show host and huckster of crappy products from bankrupt companies sitting in the Oval Office? Take a closer look …
All football season long, I have been tweaking my Trump-loving relatives that I play with in my family’s fantasy football league by choosing anti-Trump names for the team. Last week, my team name was the Gang of Puppets.
I still go back and forth as to whether I should have named the team Gang of Putin. Oh well, both work.
I wanted to finish off the season with a good name and logo. I considered The Indictables or The Indictmentals using a Roger Stone pic as the team logo.
That is one goofy looking head. I think it is a done deal that a Roger Stone indictment is imminent. But I had already featured Stone as a team logo, or at least his Dick Nixon back tattoo.
I skipped another Stone team name and logo. I have tried to make my team names and logos topical. Trending in the news now is this pic …
My wife does not use Twitter. My wife does not like Donald Trump. She seemed to me to be the perfect person to try my first Trump Twitter Test.
I refuse to follow Donald Trump on Twitter or anywhere else, but I do check in on him from time to time. I do follow a Donald Trump parody account that amuses me to no end.
So the test I prepared was to present my wife a parody Trump tweet and a real Trump tweet to see if she could identify parody vs. real. Would you like to play, too?
I have prepared the 2 tweets so they present very similarly. Ready? Here’s #1.
Here’s #2.
I’m confused, which everyone who has ever read this blog already knows. I think Donald Trump is correct when he complains about ‘Fake News.’ I am starting to believe it exists.
Take this video from Judge Jeanine Pirro from Fox News on Michael Flynn. You may want to skip to the very end where Pirro suggests that Judge Sullivan could throw out Flynn’s guilty plea.
Did you watch the whole video? Did you throw up in your mouth just a bit in parts like I did? Understandable. This “judge throws out Flynn’s guilty plea due to FBI wrongdoing” narrative had been pushed by Fox News and White House talking heads for a while. Instead, Judge Emmet Sullivan, a Reagan appointee, excoriated Flynn in a blistering diatribe to the point of dropping the treason bomb as a possible additional charge. Oops.
And what about the Clinton Foundation?
We have a beautiful dog.
She’s got some issues. One issue is that she scratches and bites herself … A LOT! It could be from mites, allergies (Mite Be Allergic), the environment, hormones, etc. In other words, our vet has no idea. She actually has some bald spots now. I feel for her as I do, too. My wife is making me very uncomfortable with all her talk about how bad the bald spots on the dog look. It is hitting too close to home. Sure, I don’t scratch and bite my hair out, but still, I’m a bit touchy.
And then I saw White House Nazi Stephen Miller on Face The Nation this past Sunday morning. He is a known baldy, but he looked very different this time. Take a look. Before is on the left and Face The Nation Stephen Miller is on the right.
If you are reading this blog post while wearing a ball gag and handcuffs, I am sorry to tell you that you have been misled by the title. I am talking about fantasy football domination in my family league like this …
Can I get a booyah for a shutout?
Thank you. I don’t know which one of my Trump-loving relatives runs that Bye team (and what a terrible name for a fantasy football team with no logo whatsoever), but that team sucks. They scored nothing against me last week. Total fantasy domination.
But that was last week, and I only have a couple more weeks left in the season to tweak the Trump-lovers in my family fantasy football league with clever team names and logos like last week’s Collusionistas.
I wanted to hammer (and sickle) the Russian connection more, so here is my new team logo …
The dream is over. When I last blogged about my family league’s Blue Wavers 40 fantasy football team, it had pulled itself out of last place and was stacking wins on the way to the playoffs. Go Blue Wavers 40!
Except, the Blue Wavers 40 didn’t make it. Four straight wins to end the season was not enough to snag the last playoff spot, snatched by a nephew (no longer a favorite) on a tie-breaker. And to think I did a reading at his wedding. After ripping the final playoff spot away from me and stomping my heart into a red gelatinous puddle, he better not ask me to do a reading at his divorce.
But I do get to play on. That means it is time for a team name change to the …
Remember when bringing back the coal industry was a thing?
Two years into the Trump Reich and we see this …
But especially those Q’s! The QAnon people (known as Q’s) are a subset of Trump supporters. They get their inside info from an anonymous source they call Q. Q tells them that the Deep State is actively working to subvert Trump, but Trump will triumph on … get ready for this … December 5th. Ta-da! Oh wait, it’s already December 6th. This is the point in the show where the magician can’t seem to find the rabbit that was supposed to get pulled from his hat.
Yep, the Q followers should be em-bear-assed for all the ‘lion’ that Q does.
It’s a shame that all their memes will go to waste. Like this mysterious, scary one …
I’m not yet very experienced in Twitter. I’m in the process of emerging from my Facebook chrysalis, and my Twitter wings are still wet. So when I saw that it looks like I’m being followed on Twitter by one of the most ruthless mobsters from the most famous crime family in the USA, I was not pleased. I didn’t panic. I didn’t delete all my tweets. I did clean out my 401K, but that was simply to pay a delinquent gas bill. Sorry, but just not a dedicated saver here and the weather is downright cold.
This is the Twitter notification I saw that sent chills through my body, or maybe it was that our gas heat had been shut off for going on 3 days now. Continue reading “I’m Being Followed”
Rudy Giuliani was born as Rudolph Giuliani. Yesterday’s holiday-themed post featured a Giuliani tweet, and it got me thinking of a festive holiday parody song featuring him. No, not White Power Christmas, Arrest Ye Guilty Gentlemen, or even O Flip All Ye Guilty. I’m talking about …
Wait, what? You know already? Oh right, the damn title of this blog post. So much for suspense, and the same goes for Mike Pence. Sorry, been doing too much rhyming. Without further ado, here is Rudolph, The Lame-Ass Lawyer.
I am so thankful for Twitter. Now I know how I want my Christmas lights to look this year …
Doesn’t that arouse inside of you a desire to come and see the climax of my Christmas decorating? But that’s not all the holiday decorating that Twitter has inspired.
Every year I do a Nativity on Ice, but it is always so difficult putting skates on the dog. Who else is going to play the role of the ass in the stable? Don’t answer that. Regardless, instead of a Nativity on Ice this season, thanks to Twitter, I am inspired to do … Continue reading “God Bless Twitter”
I’m going to put most of my snarkiness aside today and take a day off to mourn the passing of former President George Herbert Walker Bush.
I didn’t always like his politics, but I always believed he was an honorable man and a patriot. However, I cannot completely forgive him for resembling his son, George W Bush, in that picture above.
I hope this “man” will not be invited to the funeral, and if he is, certainly not allowed to speak.
I have invented a time-saving grammar innovation to help revolutionize the world. However, due to Donald Trump, I can’t implement it across the USA. I will explain.
We’re always wasting time. A good example is this blog. I wasted time writing this post, and now I’m wasting your time as you read it. You’re welcome! Sure, an easy solution would be for me to stop blogging. How many of you have asked the question, “Why does he keep writing that drivel?”
Hey, that was rhetorical. Hands down please.
I wondered if there wasn’t another way to save time so I could still waste time with this blog. I set to work on a solution.
But I couldn’t come up with anything because the room was full of floating mathematical equations. Geez, those are annoying.
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 