Trump’s Secret Tweet Message of Truth

Donald Trump is telling the truth. I know that is hard to believe, but I am convinced that he is truthfully speaking to us, the American public, through his tweets. We just have to find the true meaning in his tweeted messages.

Take this one for example …

Trump Tweet Media

I see the message. I see the truth. I feel liberated. Oops, that’s just due to a lack of pants as I type this. But I do see the message as I separate the wheat from the chaff. Take a closer look …

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Ainsley Outed!

I swear I was NOT watching Fox & Friends this morning purposely. I didn’t even realize it was on one of the televisions in the workout room in the hotel where I was staying. I was already into my treadmill run when I noticed it was on. When I run, I am barely able to continuously put one foot in front of the other. There was absolutely no way that I would be able to pause the treadmill, get off the treadmill, change the channel, get back on the treadmill, start the treadmill, and continue running. That was just not going to happen. Somewhere between pausing the treadmill and getting back on, I would end up sitting on the weight bench eating a candy bar, despite not even having a candy bar in my possession. So I plodded on while the blithering idiots on Fox & Friends blathered on.

They were discussing ancestry and exploring one’s heritage through DNA analysis. When thinking of the Fox & Friends hosts’ ancestry, this image flashed through my mind …

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Senate Dems Raise Trump Cabinet IQ

Trump Tweet Cabinet empty

Donald Trump should be thanking rather than verbally spanking Senate Democrats. Several of Trump’s confirmed Cabinet members actually have lower IQ’s than the empty Cabinet seats they filled. By delaying confirmation of the remaining Trump Cabinet nominees, Senate Democrats may be helping keep the average IQ of Trump’s Cabinet higher than if all seats were filled. Betsy DeVos, the only Cabinet member with an IQ in negative double digits, was available for comment, but unable to utter an intelligible sentence.

Celebrate International Women’s Day!

International Women's Day

Now how the heck am I going to enjoy International Women’s Day without women around?

I did encourage my wife to wear red today. She didn’t, mainly because she was already dressed for work.

I did encourage my wife to take a day off. She didn’t, mainly because the school that our youngest child attends would close if all the women working there took a day off, and she believes in getting our daughter all the education she can get before the DeVos Effect takes hold.

I encouraged her to spend money today, hoping that the pattern of the first two would continue to the third.

But it’s not just me celebrating International Women’s Day. It should come as no surprise that Donald Trump tweeted his support …

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Apostrophe Catastrophe

Donald Trump is making news on this Presidents Day already.

trump-tweet-presidents-day

Trump is probably too old to have gotten a participant trophy for soccer. They didn’t hand them out like diuretics at a nursing home back in the days when he was a wee lad. Now he wants his own trophe, or more correctly, his (apos)trophe. Wow, that is really a stretch, even for me.

Presidents Day? Nope, this day is not about a general milieu of presidents. This is about him. And isn’t General Milieu under consideration as National Security Advisor?

Presidents’ Day? Ah, the plural possessive form that literally nobody understands how to use properly, and certainly not Trump. Misusing an apostrophe? Trump says, “Your fired.”

President’s Day? He gets this. The day is his. Enjoy suckling at his presidential teat on President’s Day as the fake media writes that he has man boobs.

Enemy of the People

I decided to follow Trump’s lead on the media. In response to this real Trump tweet from yesterday …

trump-tweet-media-enemy

I punched out our paperboy this morning. I figured he must be complicit with our enemy, delivering their fake news. That did not work out well. And is it really fair that unexpired, perfectly good coupons cannot be used to help make bail?

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Trump Needs a Staff Plumber

Warning: This is not one of my humorous (some would say hilarious) fake Trump tweets. Do not feign laughter so my feelings are not hurt, not that you would since it is obvious that my feelings are not that important to you. So far, no cards, texts or emails on this Valentine’s Day. Sure I’ll be yours, but you have to ask. Hmmm, somehow I got off track. Hurt feelings can really mess with a person’s mental GPS. Anyway, this is a real Trump tweet from today …trump-tweet-leaks

3 words for Trump: ASK.  YOUR.  STAFF.

 

 

 

 

Another Trump Post From Flanigan Flanigan (don’t worry, this odd title will make sense if you read this post)

Warning … Warning … Warning

This is a REAL pic that Trump tweeted within the past day. I have not doctored it in any way as I have been known to do.

trump-tweet-reagan

Trump seems so proud of it. How very personal. Signed by Nancy & Reagan Reagan. Wait, Reagan who? Reagan Reagan? Can you stutter when writing your name? Maybe Reagan Reagan is the dude with the gold braiding and epaulets over there to the right of Ronnie in the pic.

Well, if Ronnie’s signature is fake, maybe the “With best wishes” sentiment is phony, too. Based on what Trump stands for, I think this makes more sense …

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