Halloween Hijinks

I hope you all had a fun Halloween. We started celebrating the scary holiday by attending Halloweensteen, a Bruce Springsteen tribute concert performed annually by Chicago native singer/songwriter Michael McDermott. It appears to be a beloved Chicago tradition that I had never heard of before with many repeat attendees. Now I know why. The show exceeded our expectations. There’s a big difference between a bunch of local musicians forming a tribute band to mimic an artist’s music and a professional musician like McDermott assembling other professional musicians to interpret and perform another professional’s songs.

Our seats were outstanding. The last time my wife and I were at the excellent and classy Park West concert hall, we stood and swayed through a show by Brit pop-rocker Dave Edmunds. However, my wife has knee issues worse than me, so I called ahead to check and see if we could be guaranteed seats. Well, not only were we provided seats, but they were just off to the side of the stage on a padded bench in a handicappped section. We had a great view.

There was a bit of a problem as drinking progressed at the 2+ hour show. I’ll explain.

Continue reading “Halloween Hijinks”

The Liberal Media Invades Football (satire alert!)

I think I finally understand the complaints about the liberal media. It all became perfectly clear as I watched my beloved Chicago Bears dismantle the New England Patriots on Monday Night Football last night. Take a look at who Peyton and Eli Manning had as a guest on their Manningcast.

That’s right. A liberal former Democrat President who had nothing to do with football during his career. How about having a qanonservative former Republican President as a guest who actually owned a professional football team? Here’s the story.

Continue reading “The Liberal Media Invades Football (satire alert!)”

On The Campaign Trail & a FREE Book!

I’ve been busy recently supporting local Democrat candidates by hitting the campaign trail while also working at my business and writing this biting humor blog.

Editor’s Note: This idiot once heard someone say that his blog bites, so that’s where he got the idea that this blog contains “biting humor.”

As the elected Democratic Precinct Committee Person for the area, my job is to deliver candidate literature, signs, and general encouragement to vote. That’s all well and good, and I am happy to do so. However, I was less than thrilled to be called this name as I arrived at a house …

Continue reading “On The Campaign Trail & a FREE Book!”

Do I Make a Fashion or Political Statement?

I’m scheduled today to attend a family gathering where a very conservative family member from out-of-town will also make an appearance. How conservative? He made it clear at a past family reunion that he believes Democrats are evil satanists while I was standing right there. I reminded him that our family are loyal Democrats. He gave a bit of a harumph and said something like, “Present company excluded.” I don’t think he was sincere. It reminded me of Rodney Dangerfield in Caddyshack when he was railing about a hat in the golf pro shop in front of Ted Knight who was wearing the exact hat.

So, I don’t want to be wearing anything that reminds him that I’m a baby-sacrificing, blood-drinking Democrat, or do I? Speaking of blood, it’s bloody hot today, so I’m wearing a light t-shirt. Do you think any of these may make a fashionably political statement?

We always tell our kids to make good choices. I may want to take my own advice as I dress myself.

When Pigs Fly

You may have heard or used the expression “when pigs fly” before. What about when they are “flying” around a racetrack? I will be working the booth for the local county Democrats again this year at the annual local County Fair coming up in July. We will try our best to convert Republicans, Trumpers, MAGAs, RINOs, QAnons, Libertarians, pedestrians, and “patriots” to vote Democrat in November. Trust me, it’s an uphill battle. Consider who attends the fair when the local yokel newspaper posts this online as an attention-grabbing headline.

Old favorite? What’s even scarier to me is that I can walk to the fairgrounds from my house. Oh well, better get my bib overall shorts cleaned and pressed. It’s fair-goin’ time!

Ironic Republican Political Advertising

You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to serve as an elected government official, but it doesn’t hurt. We’re spoiled by the elected representatives in our Fox River Valley area. Representing our area in the US House of Representatives, we have a literal rocket scientist (Democrat Dr. Bill Foster with his Doctorate in Physics), another scientist with a Master’s Degree in Biochemical Engineering (Democrat Sean Casten), a registered nurse (Democrat Lauren Underwood), and an attorney with his undergrad degree in Mechanical Engineering (Democrat Raja Krishnamoorthi). Hmm, what do they all have in common? Yes, they are all from this area. Yes, they are all currently serving in the House of Representatives. Yes, they all received votes. I sense you aren’t even trying. Think on it just a bit more. No, despite being House members, they don’t all actually live in the same house, à la the TV show Big Brother. Try again. Yes, that’s correct! They are all Democrats.

Well, what we have for her and all citizens of the USA are competent people providing good governance. Meanwhile, across the aisle, I saw these two ads for a Republican candidate for governor in Georgia.

Continue reading “Ironic Republican Political Advertising”

Republicans Saved Me From Embarrassment

I had a morning coffee meeting with a local Republican government official this week. It was a beautiful morning, clear and crisp, so I decided to bike there. There was only one big problem … my masks are in my car. I was halfway there when I realized that I was maskless, and Illinois has an indoor mask mandate. Uh-oh. I began to consider what my Plan B and Plan C would be.

I decided Plan B would be for me to signal to my meeting buddy to come outside, order for me, and we’ll sit outside. Except, I couldn’t recall exactly what he looked like. That could be a problem. I knew he was an older white male. Shocker for a Republican.

Anyway, I felt like I needed a Plan C. It turned out to be this …

Continue reading “Republicans Saved Me From Embarrassment”

Overcoming Adversity vs Giant Shit Show

At the Democratic National Convention last week, Joe Biden pulled out the stuttering handicap he overcame for all to see. Apparently, he helps and mentors stutterers he meets in his travels. A young stuttering teen named Brayden spoke on Biden’s behalf at the convention. Here’s the first meeting between Biden & Brayden.

No, I’m not crying. I think I have something in my eye that must have punctured my eyeball and is causing it to ooze.

That’s all well and good, but what about Trump’s handicap? No, not the textbook narcissism. He overcame bone spurs. BONE SPURS! They sound very boney and spurry. But he overcame them so well, that he can now do this …

Continue reading “Overcoming Adversity vs Giant Shit Show”

Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1

There are already too many Democratic candidates for the 2020 Presidential race. So each month, I will reduce the field by one candidate through an announcement in this blog. If more keep joining the race, we may have to eliminate a candidate every two weeks. After my blog post, the candidate named in the post will be notified and expected to withdraw from the race. Maybe by the 2020 convention, we’ll have the field whittled down to a single, strong candidate to defeat Donald Trump in 2020.

The first candidate I am eliminating from the race is …

Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1”

A Weight Has Been Lifted

My life has been decidedly different the past two months. Sure, the Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s holidays have played a role in changing my life as I have been selling my blood plasma weekly in order to pay for holiday entertaining and presents. Do you know how hard it is to type when you’re woozy from being a pint low? But that’s not the real change. I’m talking about shedding a weight that has rested heavy on my shoulders the past two years. I know, I know, I should also shed some weight around my mid-section. But that weight on my shoulders was formidable, and now it is almost completely gone, lifting itself from my shoulders pound by pound daily over the past two months. And it has definitely changed this blog. Thank God something has. I’ll explain.

Continue reading “A Weight Has Been Lifted”

Well, Now What?

Now that Bart O’Kavanaugh has been confirmed to the US Supreme Court, I think we have learned a few things.

First, Republican Senator Lisa Murkowski deserves some respect. She listened to her constituents, and voted in a way to represent their wishes. I hear that useless bag of creepy skin filled with idiocy and oozing out word jumbles known as Sarah Palin is threatening to primary Murkowski in 2020. Newsflash! Murkowski was already primaried in the last Senate election in 2010 by her beloved Republican party, and she still won the general election as a freakin’ write-in candidate. Do you know how hard it is to spell Murkowski?

Q: What Democrat looks like a Republican, talks like a Republican, and votes like a Republican?

Continue reading “Well, Now What?”

Democracy is Healthy

This whole democracy thing is really getting me healthy. The precinct I serve as Democratic Precinct Committee Person is large geographically. There are some large homes on large lots. I already blogged that some of the driveways of the larger homes are longer than the street I live on. I can’t efficiently walk from home to home, even if I drive into the neighborhood. My trusty old bike is the best way to quickly travel from door to door in some neighborhoods in my precinct.

Bike

As I traveled to the far reaches of my precinct on my bike shortly after dawn one day, I encountered this …

Continue reading “Democracy is Healthy”

A Billionaire is Ruining My Facebook

Last weekend, I was an active participant in democracy, and now my Facebook is all askew. I blame a billionaire who I embraced on Sunday. I never thought I would type those words, or that my Facebook would be turned topsy-turvy. I will explain …

Continue reading “A Billionaire is Ruining My Facebook”

Sergeant Flanigan?

After the upcoming primary election in a week, area Democrats will get together the following month for a unifying convention. Yay! Party time!

ComicCon-GavinBond

It could be as contentious as shown in the pic after an increasingly nasty primary campaign, but I do not expect it to look that fun or weird. I am excited that there may be a new opportunity for me to rise up the ladder in the Democratic Party.

Continue reading “Sergeant Flanigan?”

Sign of the Times

I can’t wait for the ground to thaw enough to get my new sign in the ground in front of my house.

Sign.jpg

I wish I had purchased more … a LOT more, but not because I have that big of a front yard. And Christmas is after the November election, so I didn’t want to buy them as Christmas gifts, and I also don’t have that many friends which should come as no surprise to readers of this blog.

Continue reading “Sign of the Times”