Persist to Resist

Well, Attorney General Barr did his job as a Trump lackey appointee and threw cold water on any Special Counsel Robert Mueller findings over the weekend. I think the passage of time will reveal some more positive takeaways, but for now, what do we do? This?

Belushi drinking

Okay, so I did a little of that myself on Sunday. The Mueller investigation was not the end game. It has spun off so many other investigations that will continue on. I also have a feeling that when House Democrats get their hands on the full Mueller report, maybe Trump will start to once again look a bit more collusiony and obstructiony when all the details are revealed.

So put down the bottle and ask yourself …

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A Weight Has Been Lifted

My life has been decidedly different the past two months. Sure, the Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s holidays have played a role in changing my life as I have been selling my blood plasma weekly in order to pay for holiday entertaining and presents. Do you know how hard it is to type when you’re woozy from being a pint low? But that’s not the real change. I’m talking about shedding a weight that has rested heavy on my shoulders the past two years. I know, I know, I should also shed some weight around my mid-section. But that weight on my shoulders was formidable, and now it is almost completely gone, lifting itself from my shoulders pound by pound daily over the past two months. And it has definitely changed this blog. Thank God something has. I’ll explain.

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Trump Circus Visits Another Holiday Inn

Hmmm, what is it about Holiday Inns and Trump circus events recently? Steve Bannon performed his white nationalist act to an almost empty Holiday Inn in Topeka, Kansas recently. And now 2 pro-Trump, anti-Mueller clowns performed their disappearing victim magic trick at a Holiday Inn in DC.

Meet Jacob Wohl and Jack Burkman, GOP operatives, if by operatives, I mean morons.

wohl-800x458

On the left, Jacob Wohl is a 20-year-old disgraced former hedge fund manager who earned a lifetime ban on futures trading and has since turned himself into a Trump-supporting conspiracy theorist online. On the right, Jack Burkman held a press conference with his pants fly open.

They were there to present a victim of sexual abuse at the hands of Russia Special Counsel Robert Mueller, a very serious charge.

  • Except the victim did not appear.
  • Except the firm leading the investigation has a phone number that goes to Jacob Wohl’s mom’s cell phone. (Wohl to mom, “Mom, I hate you. You know you are supposed to answer your phone as Surefire Intelligence.”)
  • Except Surefire Intelligence’s website shows fake employees with stock photos.
  • Except there is evidence that Robert Mueller was somewhere else the day of the alleged assault.
  • Except there was a Trump Rat Truck in the parking lot visible from the window of the press conference room.

Wait, what?

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Fantasy Feud

The NFL season has begun. That means my fantasy football season has begun. That means my fantasy feuding with my Trump-loving relatives in my family’s fantasy football league has begun. Say that 3 times fast.

I explained in a prior post about my plan to tweak the Trumpkin relatives in my family’s fantasy football league with Trump-baiting team names. I entered our online draft as the DC United Patriots with this team logo.

patriots logo

That elicited nary a comment. Who can complain about someone with a patriotic team name and logo? So for week 1, I decided to turn up the tweaking a bit. Here’s my week 1 team logo …

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Trump Takes

Donald Trump cares. He knows we don’t have as much time as he does to watch television and tweet about what he just saw on Fox and Friends. He is always trying to help us through Twitter. He just helped us again. He knows we may not be able to keep up with all the times he obstructed justice during interviews, press conferences, rallies, statements, and tweets. Just in case we forgot that he has obstructed justice, we are grateful that he dropped this tweet on us …

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This Road Trip Feels Different

I am heading back on the road today, this time for business. As I pack, this trip feels different. I will no longer be travelling through the “land of the free and home of the brave” according to the Star-Spangled Banner. We now keep migrant children in cages, and Trump supporters fear them. Woody Guthrie wrote “This land is your land, this land is my land,” but that no longer applies. Thanks to the Trump Muslim ban being upheld by the Supreme Court, this land is not a land for Muslims any longer.

Will I do anything different this trip?

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Happy Flynn Flip Friday!

It’s my birthday today, but nobody cares, including me. My birthday is being completely overshadowed by Flynn Flip Friday which is fine by me. I wasn’t surprised or even upset that the first (and maybe last) annual Christmas Tree lighting ceremony on my birthday eve under Trump literally drew tens of people to it …

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My Lost Thanksgiving TV

I was up well before dawn on this Thanksgiving day. That’s not unusual, because Dawn usually likes to sleep late on holidays. I was on a mission. There was a 48″ TV on sale at 6AM at a local store for 200 bucks. Our TV is only 32″, and no, I do not feel emasculated typing that. So I was up at 5AM and getting ready to leave when I recalled this story from last night’s Rachel Maddow Show …

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Meat The Nominee

BREAKING NEWS …

Donald Trump’s choice to be the Department of Agriculture’s chief scientist, Sam Clovis (not a scientist) has withdrawn himself from consideration for the position in light of his recent testimony to Robert Mueller’s investigative team and grand jury regarding his time as a member of the Trump campaign.

Sam Clovis

However, in an unprecedented break with Clovis, deciding to remain in consideration for the position at the Department of Agriculture are the jowls and throat wattle of Clovis. A spokesperson for Clovis’s jowls and throat wattle released a statement saying, “A meaty position like this at the USDA requires a similarly meaty candidate, and the jowls and throat wattle of Sam Clovis certainly meat <wink> that criteria.”

This would indeed be a rare occurrence if jowls and a throat wattle are considered for such a choice, meaty position, and if confirmed, it would be a job well done. Gawd, I’m hungry for a steak now.

New Trump, Same Bad Memory

I want to extend my congratulations to Donald Trump on the birth of his new grandson, whose arrival was of course tweeted out …

Trump Tweet Grandson

In related news, Trump’s lead lawyer in the Russia investigation, Ty Cobb, said that the newest Trump has no knowledge of anything Russian and would be unavailable to Robert Mueller for testimony regarding the Russia investigation for at least a year. Expected godfather “Uncle” Felix Sater was unavailable for comment.

And with a late round pick in the Kremlingate legal draft, Robert Mueller selects …

Kremlingate Special Counsel Robert Mueller just hired Michael Dreeben to join his investigative team, although his addition may signal the team turning from investigative to more prosecutorial now.

From the Washington Post, “Michael is the most brilliant and most knowledgeable federal criminal lawyer in America — period,” said Walter Dellinger, a law professor at Duke University School of Law and acting solicitor general for the 1996-1997 term of the Supreme Court.

Donald Trump, “Uh-oh.”

The WaPo continues, “Dreeben is 1 of the top legal & appellate minds at DOJ in modern times,” former Manhattan U.S. attorney Preet Bharara tweeted after learning of Mueller’s recruitment of Dreeben.

Meanwhile, Donald Trump has this guy in his corner …

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