The title of this post could apply to this blog from the very first post, but it is especially applicable now. It used to be that readers could count on a post full of drivel from me almost every single day. You may have noticed (and rejoiced) that my posts have become more sporadic and less Trumpy. As for the latter, I am just sick of that saggy skin sack of lies and monkey feces. Sorry, that’s not fair to monkeys.
Wow, touchy. I said I was sorry. Anyway, I just want Trump impeached and voted out in 2020. I find nothing funny about him any longer.
As for the sporadicity (not a word, but a potential album title) of my posts, that’s another story.
I started this blog to learn how to write better. It’s been over 3 years now. Reading this blog, a case can be made that I need to take even more time. However, I’ve been moving on and have found myself neck-deep in several writing projects.
First, I’m anxiously waiting to hear if a short story I submitted will be published in a collection of stories. We had to choose a picture from a pool of pics offered and write to that pic. This one spoke to me to write about …
The publisher read the first couple paragraphs of the story I submitted and told me they made her laugh. Oddly enough, those paragraphs were supposed to be serious character development. I hope I can share with you soon my first published piece.
I’m also putting together a book of short stories about death. Sounds cheerful, right? I’m fortunate to have my cousin/godmother/pseudo big sister editing for me. I’m not sure how much more criticism I can take from her though. In my latest story, she has me rewriting the whole ending and I found this comment from her in the margin …
What? Me, not clever? She can be brutal, but she’s making me a better writer, whether I want to be or not.
I do push back from time to time. She changed the words “tray full of doughnuts” to “trayful of doughnuts.” Trayful is not a word, right? Spellcheck tells me it is not a word. My wife agrees. Not. A. Word. Wrong. It is a word, but I have never heard it used in common parlance, which is another word (parlance) that I never hear used in common parlance. We’re going to compromise with “tray filled with doughnuts” so everyday morons like me (my target audience) can understand it.
I also am contemplating a Mite Be Funny book project. I know, it’s a one-joke cartoon concept, but I just can’t let it die a peaceful death. And, believe it or not, I should have another new Mite Be Funny cartoon tomorrow. That should be enough warning to get you to sleep in.
I have a non-fiction book about 2/3 of the way done from a couple years ago that is bad. It started off promising, but it went completely off the rails somewhere along the way. That needs a complete rewrite, but somehow, for some unknown and unfathomable reasons, I prioritize that behind my Mite Be Funny project.
And finally, this last writing project pertains to you. Yes, you the blog reader. I have a book project, and you can follow along with the writing of the book over the course of the presidential campaign. I had this idea for a book called My Parasitic Twin Wants to be President a few years back after Trump was elected. I never could come up with the bones and structure for the book though. I have it now. Every month up through the Iowa Caucuses, I will write a chapter following the lead character, a parasitic twin growing out of the chest of his host brother, on the campaign trail as he seeks to wrest the White House away from Donald Trump. By the time the Iowa Caucuses are done, the book will be done. And each month I will share excerpts from the current chapter. This coming Monday, I should have Chapter One – The Decision excerpts ready.
Initial feedback to Chapter One is encouraging. It has been described to me as totally bizarre. I hope I can keep that up for the next eight months. I want it to be bizarre, entertaining, readable, and also a political and social commentary on the Trump reign of terror.
What you read will be a rough draft. My editor has not seen this yet, although she has given me the green light to write in the style in which it is written. There will be many edits to what you will read. Remember, I write similes that are not particularly clever.
I will still try and blog when I can. Maybe all this writing will make me more prolific and more will spill over onto this blog. I have become more active on Twitter, so I encourage you to follow me @jim_flanigan. For example, just a couple days ago, Trump issued this rant about the word “manufactured.”
“I watch… every once in a while I turn to MSNBC and I’ll see what they say. I know most of the people, and it’s a fraud! They go back and they meet and… “what can we make up?” Remember they were used the word, everybody used the word “manufactured” And every newscast had the word “manufactured” but it’s not a word associated with what they were talking about. They were talking about something being manufactured. And every newscast started with “manufactured.” And they did it with numerous words—they come up with a word, they put it out. They’re all together. It’s a really disgraceful situation.”
In response, I questioned when “manufactured” was declared to no longer be a word, and offered up these song lyrics on Twitter with apologies to the Beatles …
Don’t miss scintillating banter like that. I hope to see you on Twitter. I promise to follow you back.
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 