My Parasitic Twin Wants to be President – Chapter One – The Decision

Well, I warned you all. Here are excerpts from Chapter One of the book that I’m writing concurrent with the presidential campaign. Yes, the grammar is wrong. It is written in the first person – a campaign diary supposedly written by the modestly-educated host twin of the parasitic twin candidate. The grammar is meant to be wrong. Click to read the excepts, if you dare.

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What is Wrong with this Blog?

The title of this post could apply to this blog from the very first post, but it is especially applicable now. It used to be that readers could count on a post full of drivel from me almost every single day. You may have noticed (and rejoiced) that my posts have become more sporadic and less Trumpy. As for the latter, I am just sick of that saggy skin sack of lies and monkey feces. Sorry, that’s not fair to monkeys.

monkey mad.gif

Wow, touchy. I said I was sorry. Anyway, I just want Trump impeached and voted out in 2020. I find nothing funny about him any longer.

As for the sporadicity (not a word, but a potential album title) of my posts, that’s another story.

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Coming Clean About Vacation

I haven’t posted in almost a week. Followers of this blog are rejoicing. However, questions are raised.

  • Where is he?
  • Has he gone back into the witness protection program?
  • Will he promise to stop posting forever?
  • Does the lack of posts have anything to do with Trump’s supposed border immigration agreement with Mexico?

They say the week before a vacation and the week after are the 2 busiest weeks of the year. Add in business travel to the week before I take a vacation to make it even busier and less post-friendly. So that’s where I am now. On vacation, or on holiday as they say in the UK, or England as we say in the USA, or the Kingdom of Trumpland as they say in the White House, or Crazytown as I say. Ugh, a nice vacation/holiday post ruined by Trump. Let’s get this back on track with a pretty sunset pic from our vacation lake house.

Sunset at lake house

Beautiful sunset notwithstanding, I do have problems with this lake house, and surprise of surprises, it has to do with a familiar subject …

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Mite Be Funny #120 – Post & Story Behind the Post Special Multi-Panel Edition

Mite Be Funny #120a Resignation

Today’s blog post is designed to end right here. However, should you like to learn about the story behind the post, you can click to continue reading.

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Signs the Apocalypse is Here

There are signs that the Apocalypse is nigh. First up, these are roaming the streets of the UK now …

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Mite Be Funny #118 – Mite Be Political

Mite Be Funny #118a Mint

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Flies On Washington Walls #155 – Special Multi-Panel Ben Carson House Oversight Musical Edition

FOWW #155a Ben Carson

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Winnowing the Candidates – Three Must Flee

This is really getting ridiculous. I can’t cut Democratic presidential candidates fast enough before more take their place. Here’s a recent poll from Emerson, and I have lined-out in red the candidates I have already eliminated.

Democratic Poll 5-19

Now we have Montana Governor Steve Bullock and NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio entering the race. I hate to do it, but it’s time to cut three. Here we go.

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Flies On Washington Walls #154 – Special Multi-Panel Poll Edition

FOWW #154a Poll

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No Investment in This Return

I spotted this on Twitter over the weekend …

Return1

Well, I am James the Idiot, so I had to learn more. I dove headfirst into the dazzlinglight.org website and came across this confusing text that could use a little dazzling light shining on it to help me understand it better.

Continue reading “No Investment in This Return”

Crowning Queen Melania

I saw on Twitter over the weekend that Melania Trump accepted her flaming crown as Queen of Hell …

Melania Crown.jpg

Flies On Washington Walls #153

FOWW #153a Be Best

 

FOWW #153b Be Best

Don’t Cross Him

I got confirmation that this was a real billboard in the St. Louis area.

Billboard

If what that billboard is implying is true, I have only one question …

Aren’t we way overdue for a crucifixion?

Flies On Washington Walls #152

FOWW #152a Taxes

 

FOWW #152b Taxes

A Peso for El Paso, Please

I was not shocked when I saw this news story on my phone a week ago.

 

Paso1

That did not surprise me or alarm me. Rallies to Make America Great Again cost money. But then there’s this …  Continue reading “A Peso for El Paso, Please”

Winnowing the Candidates – Pelosi’s Revenge

To catch-up the Trump supporters and similar slow/non-readers of this blog, here are the candidates we have eliminated from the Democratic primary race to date.

I mean, really, someone has to tell these people to go home and stop wasting money. I felt bad about the Delaney winnowing since he was the first in the race and seems like a good guy, until I saw this …

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Flies On Washington Walls #150

FOWW #150a Trump Lies

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Church With Strings Attached

We tried another new church on Easter Sunday. We really liked it, except for the booming organ music that shook my dental fillings at times. Maybe we should sit in the back next time, if there is one. It was a church we had tried before, but decided not to visit again due to the service featuring … a puppet show. It wasn’t a creepy or scary puppet show.

puppet creepy.gif

But it was still a puppet show. However, we decided to try it again. And we liked it! I thought maybe we had found our new church home, until I spotted this in the church bulletin …

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Easter or Passover or Random Cookies?

My wife slightly overbaked some cookies that we were going to take for a family Easter gathering, so my daughter and I got to decorate those and keep them. Score! No, I did not add 5 minutes to her timer. In addition, my wife was thoughtful enough to bake the random dough shapes that were leftover after using the cookie cutter. I was thrilled to see this one.

Cookie NJ

No, the NJ does not stand for No Jesus in honor of the Easter story that says they found his tomb empty. It stands for something else.

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notre dame damage