Flies On Washington Walls #145 – Special Multi-Panel William Barr Mueller Report Summary Edition
Category: donald trump
Persist to Resist
Well, Attorney General Barr did his job as a Trump lackey appointee and threw cold water on any Special Counsel Robert Mueller findings over the weekend. I think the passage of time will reveal some more positive takeaways, but for now, what do we do? This?
Okay, so I did a little of that myself on Sunday. The Mueller investigation was not the end game. It has spun off so many other investigations that will continue on. I also have a feeling that when House Democrats get their hands on the full Mueller report, maybe Trump will start to once again look a bit more collusiony and obstructiony when all the details are revealed.
So put down the bottle and ask yourself …
Expectation vs. Reality
My ten year old daughter and her friends often play a game of Expectation vs. Reality. They imagine the best result from some activity, and then they demonstrate the failed reality. For example, here is the dive they expect to do in the pool …
And then the reality they demonstrate is …
Maybe not that bad. That looks painful. I don’t want my youngest and her friends hurt.
Trump supporters play this same game all day, every day. For example, this is their view of the “National Emergency.”
Flies On Washington Walls #144
Time to Come Clean
Being on the road again, I had hoped to bring you some Americana sightseeing tales and pics. However, inclement weather interceded, so I will bring you another travel tip. I know what you’re thinking, “Please, not another post about hotel soap.”
“But … but … hotel soap is an integral part of my business travel,” I protest. How about a Trumpy soap post? I know you want it. Let’s go.
When presented with 2 soap choices, always use the smaller one and take the larger soap home.
Now, I know Trump supporters may struggle with how to determine which is larger and which is smaller. I’ll try and make it relatable for them.
Is America Great or Not?
I saw this on Twitter this morning …
What happened in that one minute to change America from having to be made great to being great? Maybe Fox & Friends said something. Maybe nothing. Maybe he is tooting his own horn while still trying to sell more of those MAGA caps. Maybe his brain just continues to melt into dementia.
Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1 Revised – Pete’s Back, Back Pete
Thankfully, South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg has taken his sweet time to officially announce he’s out of the Democratic race for President after I cut him last week. I’m certain he’s not ignoring me, and has just been getting his campaign in order before withdrawing gracefully from the race. Hold on, Mayor Pete. You’re back in.
My decision is partially because there was a winnowing of potential candidates that organically took place over the last week. Just take a look at this list that announced they are not running:
- Michael Bloomberg. He will have to find solace with just being a billionaire and the 9th richest person in the world. Poor guy.
- Hillary Clinton. She will have to be satisfied knowing that she could win the popular vote against Trump … again.
- Senator Jeff Merkly. I like him even more after he pranked us with this video announcing he will not run.
- Senator Sherrod Brown. He took Ben Carson’s advice at the 1:00 minute mark in this video, and he’ll be reprising Peter Falk’s role as Columbo in a new Broadway play.
- Former Attorney General Eric Holder. He is the main reason Mayor Pete is back in the race. I’ll explain.
Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1 Revised – Pete’s Back, Back Pete”
Good vs Bad Ideas
I fancy myself an idea person, although I readily admit that most of my ideas are bad. I like to think that I have had so many bad ideas in my life that I have become a pretty good judge of ideas. I’ll give you an example.
Area Democrats are marching in the local St. Patrick’s Day Parade this Saturday. I will be marching with my daughter, unless it is too cold, or rainy, or if she gets a better offer. Then I’ll be proudly walking without my daughter and just with my fellow Democrats, flipping off anyone in the crowd with a MAGA hat on. Just kidding. I wouldn’t do that. But a MAGA-hatted parade watcher was flipping off Democrats in the last parade I marched in. Those MAGAts are class acts.
Anyway, a fellow Democrat offered the following ideas for the parade via email …
Swing & Miss(ile)
We already covered Donald Trump’s disastrous summit in Vietnam with Kim Jong-un. Now we get word that North Korea appears to be rebuilding a nuclear missile test site.
I can’t tell anything from that picture. That could be an overhead pic of a mile away from my house for all I know. But the experts seem to think it looks fishy. Regardless of whether North Korea is actually rebuilding its nuclear test site or not, I saw this on Twitter and thought it just so perfectly summed-up the Trump-Kim relationship.
Mite Be Funny #106 – YUGE Multi-Panel Edition
Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1
There are already too many Democratic candidates for the 2020 Presidential race. So each month, I will reduce the field by one candidate through an announcement in this blog. If more keep joining the race, we may have to eliminate a candidate every two weeks. After my blog post, the candidate named in the post will be notified and expected to withdraw from the race. Maybe by the 2020 convention, we’ll have the field whittled down to a single, strong candidate to defeat Donald Trump in 2020.
The first candidate I am eliminating from the race is …
Calamari Appeteaser
I am always eager to order calamari as an appetizer when I eat out. Yum. I enjoy the chewy texture which makes it seem like the calamari is fighting back a bit when I’m eating it. Give up calamari. You cannot defeat my jaws of steel and digestive juices.
Michael Cohen threw us a calamari appeteaser with his testimony when he dropped the name of Matthew Calamari numerous times. Who? Was Michael Cohen talking about a favorite character in Good Fellas or The Godfather?
Calamari is apparently former security muscle and now the COO of the Trump Organization. Do you think he knows some stuff that Americans would like to know? Get ready to see this guy Matthew Calamari in front of some House committees being grilled in the near future.
Some Summit
The Donald Trump – Kim Jong-un Summit in Vietnam is over quicker than expected. Trump left earlier than planned and looked grumpy. Maybe it was the chairs?
Were the chairs chosen to make Kim look slim and tall while Trumpy looks short and fat? If so, that worked perfectly. And speaking of fat, here’s an artist’s conception of possibly why they could not reach any agreement …
Flies On Washington Walls #143
Haiku to You
I saw some 3-5-3 haiku on Twitter regarding Florida House Rep and Trump sycophant Matt Gaetz threatening Michael Cohen via this tweet.
I could not resist trying my hand at some haiku. I came up with a lot of variations on the same theme, but finally settled on this.
Gaetz sends tweet
To intimidate
Commits crime
Flies On Washington Walls #142 – Feel the Bern Multi-Panel Edition
Unpresidented
I thought a lot about President’s Day yesterday. I drove from Chicago down to St. Louis, and passed through Lincoln, Illinois as well as Springfield, Illinois where a young Abraham Lincoln lived and worked as an Illinois state legislator. I think Lincoln shed a few tears yesterday because of a tweet. Surprisingly, it was not a tweet from Donald Trump. No, this tweet came from Honest Abe’s own Republican party. Take a look …
Surviving Day 2 of a National Emergency
Donald Trump sought refuge at what appears to be a very crappy omelet bar at Mar-a-Lago as the United States bravely somehow made it through Day 2 of our national emergency of not having a big wall that Mexico refuses to pay for.
Trump made good use of his Eggsecutive Time to decide if he wanted ketchup on his omelet or not. Two bottles of ketchup at the Mar-a-Lago omelet bar. Classy.
But something is amiss in that picture. Take a another look.
Flies On Washington Walls #141 – National Emergency Multi-Panel Edition
Flies On Washington Walls #140
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 