My new scar is not it. It’s pathetic.
I was so hopeful. This post-skin cancer surgery wound held such promise.
WARNING: DO NOT READ FURTHER IF YOU ARE SQUEAMISH.
I have 2 excellent scars that I am more than willing to show you. However, one is on the bottom of my foot from the time I was standing on a fish bowl while playing with my bird. What’s that? You don’t understand? I think that statement was quite explanatory. The other excellent scar is on my back from one of my skin cancer removals. Nobody wants to look at that scar buried in my back fat. So, with my recent skin cancer removal from my leg, I was excited to soon have a very visible scar. I mean, that Harry Potter was so lucky.
Such a cool scar and all he has to do is lift his hair. Based on my hair or lack thereof, such a scar on me would be visible 100% of the time on me. Well, at least this leg scar of mine will be easily visible if I keep my left leg shaved and wear shorts all the time.
I’m heading out to a restaurant tonight and I was ready to cross my legs and show-off the scar. But this has happened … Continue reading “I’m Mad At My Dermatologist”
I retired our pool liner last year. It had gotten brittle over several seasons of use (I can relate) and had started springing leaks (I can also relate) that I was patching. I figured there would be no problem purchasing a replacement liner for a 4 year old pool. Boy, was I wrong (I relate too often).
Apparently, my old pool liner was a death trap because of only 1 filter intake line. That design was deemed unsafe for some reason, discontinued, and replaced with a dual filter intake line. So, I couldn’t get the replacement liner I needed. The simple solution seemed to be to just buy a complete new pool. Nope, that was also not an option.
Due to the COVID-19 coronavirus, pools are in short supply. And when I found one like my old $350 pool, they were priced over $1000. A discount grocery store near us advertised a reasonably-priced pool, and people were lined-up at 6AM waiting for the store to open at 9AM to get a pool. Back to the replacement liner option for me.
By studying replacement part lists for the various styles of pools from the manufacturer, I decided that by enlarging holes using the precision of a brain surgeon (I cannot relate) and slapping a patch on another hole, I could make a current model pool liner fit the hardware from our old pool and make the filter system a death trap again. Except … pool liners are in short supply. I calculated that by adding cable ties and duct tape, I may be able to make a random liner from another model of pool fit the hardware from our old pool. That was a sketchy plan at best, especially when I accidentally ordered a 15 foot liner rather than the 16 footer that I needed.
I could sense something was wrong as I was assembling the pool. It didn’t seem quite right (I can relate). I got to almost the end, there were leftover parts, and the pool hardware wouldn’t fit. I cut down and drilled one of the metal parts, and voilà …
Not only do I have a 15 foot pool, but it seems sturdier than the original 16 footer. As a bonus, I did not have to use duct tape and now have a couple spare metal parts.
It looked great. I was ready to enjoy it and get some exercise. Only 352 laps to a mile! But then, the weather got chilly. Oh, and I got cancer. I’ll explain … about the cancer part. You should be able to figure out the chilly weather part yourself.
I went this week for a semi-annual full body check by my dermatologist. I have some history of skin cancer, so I can usually count on my dermatologist to take a few bits and pieces of me every visit. I was not disappointed this time.
As I sat in the waiting room before my appointment, I was taking a mental inventory of all the suspicious spots on my body that I wanted my dermatologist to take a look at. Temple, chin, chest, back, and left leg all harbored spots I didn’t like. And then I saw an unknown spot on my right leg. I was genuinely startled. That one looked nasty. How could I have missed it before? It looked something like this. In fact, it looked exactly like this because this was it …
I was hoping for a hat trick. No, I’m not talking about our hometown Chicago Blackhawks and their quest for Lord Stanley’s Cup.
They did not make the playoffs. I am talking about a personal hat trick. I got the phone call from my doctor’s office, and I can’t begin to express my disappointment. Test results were positive. Positive? Positive is always good, right? Nope. I have cancer again, and I am very disappointed in the type.