My Dermatologist Doesn’t Want Me to be a Star

Who does? I’ve encountered all sorts of obstacles on my way to Hollywood. My first movie role as Racist Restaurant Patron was eliminated when my scene was cut after the restaurant backed out of allowing filming in their place. I secured my next role as Office Worker, but family obligations conspired to keep me from attending the filming. We celebrated our youngest daughter’s church confirmation on the morning of filming and attended an Eagle Scout ceremony during the afternoon of filming. By the way, the Scoutmaster really missed a great opportunity at the end of the Eagle Scout ceremony. How about finishing up the ceremony by rocking out to Robin Trower’s “Day of the Eagle?”

I did audition for a speaking part as Family Member #2 in a film but was not selected for the role. I guess that’s more on me than anyone else’s fault because of my complete lack of acting talent or training. I have an audition this weekend for a speaking role in an indie feature film about punk music called Screw City. I’m hoping my affinity for punk music will be evident and make them overlook my dearth of acting talent and training I mentioned before.

So, you may be wondering what my dermatologist has to do with all this. Well, I went under her knife this week for a skin cancer removal through Moh’s surgery, which I understood to be a gentle scraping of layers off my skin until all the cancer can be confirmed removed. Instead, it looks more like I had Moe’s surgery.

I’ll caution those more sensitive readers (what are you doing at this blog anyway?) to not click to continue reading. This is the result of my surgery.

No, that’s not a caterpillar. I count 12 stitches in the middle of my forehead. Surprise! The good news is that my dermatologist said she gave me a bit of a brow lift. I just hope I don’t appear to be in a perpetual state of surprise.

The timing is bad since I now have a bandage across my forehead and raised eyebrows below the bandage just in time for my audition video. On the positive side, that could distract attention away from my poor acting skills. The film’s producer has been cool about it and told me not to worry about the bandage. That makes sense. I really need to be more concerned about my acting or lack thereof.