My Dermatologist Won’t Take My Advice

But who in their right mind would? It would be challenging to find anyone who would admit to taking my advice. I have seen a lot of my dermatologist recently as she carved away more skin cancer from my noggin. I was hoping that in lieu of payment, I could do some “consulting” work for her. I have spent almost all of my career in sales & marketing, so I thought I could help her out with some ways to promote her business and make her waiting room even busier.

I had noticed more women than men in the waiting room. On my initial recent visit to my dermatologist, I shared with her a way to draw more men to her practice. For every visit a man makes to her practice, offer a free transplant of 5 hairs. I’d be in to see her every couple weeks for excellent dermatological care and a better hairline.

On my next visit to her for the actual surgery, I wasn’t sure if I was more excited to have my cancer removed or get 5 hairs planted on top of my head.

But my visit was all about disappointment. Oh, sure, she excised the cancer, but she hasn’t even begun implementing the “Come See Me & Get 5 Hairs FREE!” promotion.

Look, I know she’s busy, but marketing & sales tips like she gets from me don’t come along every day. If I feed her ideas, it’s on her to implement them. As she blathered on to me about her cross-beaked rescue chicken (a really bad name for a band), I decided to gift her another sales & marketing million dollar promotional idea.

It turns out she’s got 19 total chickens. If they are all laying eggs, she can’t possibly use all those eggs for her family. The smart marketing solution is to give every customer a free egg on their visit. I mean, it just makes sense. How could she have not thought of it on her own?

So, on my final visit this week to get my stitches removed, I had my hand out for my free egg. Nope. No egg for me. My dermatologist claims that the chickens are still too young to lay eggs. Well, I reminded her that I will be back in November for my next check-up, a 5 hair transplant, and 1 fresh egg. Looking forward to it! I have a feeling she may not.


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