Post Super Tuesday Voices

The voices I hear normally tell me to practice good personal hygiene and try to stay semi-sober. However, in the wake of Super Tuesday, they have been overshadowed by new voices as I contemplate my upcoming Illinois primary vote.

My wallet had been telling me to vote for Mike Bloomberg, but how can I trust my wallet? No matter how much money I put in it, I always find it empty. Moot point now as Bloomberg is out. Hey Mike, you can always look back and know that American Samoa was all in for you. I think him being in the race was good. He showed the rest of the Democrats exactly how to attack Trump. His anti-Trump ads were clever and effective. I hope they continue.

My heart has been telling me to vote for Elizabeth Warren. However, my heart is also responsible for me ending up with … Continue reading “Post Super Tuesday Voices”

Winnowing the Candidates – Super Tuesday Edition

When I last winnowed, I had no idea that we would be talking about a new candidate when I winnowed again. I also had no idea that I wouldn’t winnow again until Super Tuesday, but the candidates were doing sufficient self-winnowing. I really like that word … winnow. Anyway, welcome to the race, Mike Bloomberg, and don’t let the door hit you in the ass when you leave … quickly … like right now. Consider yourself winnowed. We don’t need 2 non-Democrats in the Democratic primary.

I’m not surprised Elizabeth Warren is still in the race. I love her as a politician and would be proud to vote for her for President. However, I appear to be in the minority. I have heard her described as shrill. The Return of Shrillary? I think the USA still has a ways to go before accepting and electing a female as President, and that makes me sad.

Over the course of this campaign, I have personally supported the candidacies of Beto O’Rourke, Eric Swalwell, Kamala Harris, Amy Klobuchar, Mayor Pete, Liz Warren, and Joe Biden. Boy, can I ever pick the quitters. You may notice one big name candidate missing from that group. That candidate is who I voted for in the 2016 Democratic primary. That candidate is …

Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – Super Tuesday Edition”

My Parasitic Twin Wants to be President – Chapter Two – The Debates

Well, after publishing excerpts from chapter one, nobody stepped up and told me to stop writing this nonsense. You only have yourselves to blame for the following excerpts from the campaign diary called My Parasitic Twin Wants to be President.

Continue reading “My Parasitic Twin Wants to be President – Chapter Two – The Debates”

Winnowing the Candidates – Summer Vacation Edition

So far, we have made progress in winnowing the candidates. Here’s who we have winnowed so far:

  • Bernie Sanders
  • Tulsi Gabbard
  • John Delaney
  • Seth Moulton
  • Tim Ryan
  • Mike Gravel
  • John Hickenlooper
  • Wayne Messam
  • Andrew Yang
  • Eric Swalwell

Needs reasons? Just search this blog for winnowing to find all the posts. That leaves us with this field remaining.

Dem Candidates 22 wo swalwell

Except, I wasn’t quite sure who this guy is … Dem unknown

Reverse Google Image Search suggested Dr. Dorociak, a dentist from Sarasota or the deceased Daniel Judd of Gloucester, MA. I wouldn’t doubt that either of them may be running. I narrowed it down to an already-winnowed Tim Ryan or new-to-the-race NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio. Not quite sure, but it won’t matter by the end of this article. Spoiler alert!

Not pictured is former Alaskan Senator and current old man Mike Gravel, responsible for the coolest meme of the 2020 campaign so far.

Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – Summer Vacation Edition”

Winnowing the Candidates – Three Must Flee

This is really getting ridiculous. I can’t cut Democratic presidential candidates fast enough before more take their place. Here’s a recent poll from Emerson, and I have lined-out in red the candidates I have already eliminated.

Democratic Poll 5-19

Now we have Montana Governor Steve Bullock and NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio entering the race. I hate to do it, but it’s time to cut three. Here we go.

Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – Three Must Flee”

Winnowing the Candidates – 2 for 1 Edition

I have been really lax on this recurring feature. I can’t afford to be. Candidates are streaming into the Democratic primary race. So let’s get you up to speed with a quick recap.

  • I booted Mayor Pete from the race. I am so sorry I did that. He’s become one of my favorite candidates in the early going, although I’m not quite locked in on him yet.
  • So I reinstated Mayor Pete, and …
  • I bounced John Hickenlooper instead. Who? Exactly.

There may be less serious candidates to shed, but I feel I need to painfully rip a 2016 scab off now that has never fully healed. This candidate cannot be the Democratic candidate in 2020. I will not allow it.

Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – 2 for 1 Edition”

Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1

There are already too many Democratic candidates for the 2020 Presidential race. So each month, I will reduce the field by one candidate through an announcement in this blog. If more keep joining the race, we may have to eliminate a candidate every two weeks. After my blog post, the candidate named in the post will be notified and expected to withdraw from the race. Maybe by the 2020 convention, we’ll have the field whittled down to a single, strong candidate to defeat Donald Trump in 2020.

The first candidate I am eliminating from the race is …

Continue reading “Winnowing the Candidates – Part 1”

The Proof is in Your Sticker

I voted early in the Illinois primary. See, I have proof. I have a sticker.

Vote Early

I voted with my middle daughter, which I thought was kinda’ cool. I did tell her it was a crime if she didn’t take a sticker. She bought it!

It also felt weird, but good, to be voting with one of my kids. How did she get to be 21 and why do I still have a much younger daughter not even in double-digits yet in age? What felt even weirder was knowing that she voted for me.

Continue reading “The Proof is in Your Sticker”

Marco? Rubio! Marco? Rubio!

In honor of Marco Rubio’s crashing and burning presidential campaign, I suggest the kid’s swimming pool game of tag formerly known as Marco Polo now be called Marco Rubio. That’s about the only thing that will ever be named after him as it is becoming clear that there will never be a Marco Rubio Presidential Library. Consider this …

Continue reading “Marco? Rubio! Marco? Rubio!”

Best. Reality. TV. Ever. Except …

Wow, the series of 10 Republican Presidential debates taken together has been the best reality television series ever. Despite the lack of substantive discussions or facts, there was drama, comedy and conflict, exactly what you want from reality TV. Each debate saw candidates get “voted off” the main debate by how they polled with us, the general public. We even saw some “get rescued” from the junior debate and get back to the main stage when their poll numbers rose, again thanks to us. But there is just one problem.

Continue reading “Best. Reality. TV. Ever. Except …”