Tag: donald trump

Fantasy Exhaustion

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 1 Comment

Last week, my family league’s fantasy football team’s perfect record was finally blemished. I should have expected nothing less than a blemished record from the Manfart’s Mugshots.

Manafort Mugshots

That’s right, my team, under the name Manafart’s Mugshots, finally won. My streak of losses to start the season has been broken. Too bad it was a win against my liberal niece from Colorado and not against one of my Trump-loving relatives.

I have changed the team name almost every week except for the week that I kept the Baby Blimps around for an extra one because of what I received in the mail. Spoiler alert – not a pipe bomb. Now where do we go from here for the team name and logo?

Inspired once again by Donald Trump and the promises he has made, I present to you …

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Sticker Shock II

~ Jim Flanigan

If this is Sticker Shock II, should I rename my first post from earlier today as Sticker Shock I? I did not. Anyway, they have identified the bomber as Cesar Sayoc Jr.

cesar soyac

If there is a Cesar Sayoc Sr., I am sure he is so proud. But not about his son’s bombmaking skills. Thankfully, none have detonated. I’m guessing he took his bombmaking course at Trump University.

I hear that as late as 2012, he lived with his mother. That’s always either noble or weird for a 50 year old guy living with his mom. And he was working for a travelling male dance review. If I had to make the choice about living with his mom, I’m going to lean towards weird after hearing about his job.

I checked the genealogy of the Sayoc name. It appears that he is likely Filipino. Does that rule him out as a ‘white’ male? Will Trump vow to stop the caravan of migrants from the Philippines? Does Trump know the Philippines are not in Central America?

We now have a closer look at the van …

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Sticker Shock

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 1 Comment

Thank God they arrested someone in connection with the recent attempted pipe bombings. I hear he was a white male in his 50’s.

shock mild

Here is a picture of the man’s van that has also been taken away.

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Flies On Washington Walls #128

~ Jim Flanigan

FOWW #128a Migrants

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Explosive Story

~ Jim Flanigan

Breaking News …

Jim Flanigan Looks at the World has exclusively obtained a picture of the potentially explosive package sent to the Clintons, but intercepted by authorities …

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Bust the Trust

~ Jim Flanigan

Last night at a rally in Houston, Lyin’ Ted Cruz bowed and paid fealty to Donald Trump.

Cruz bows to Trump

At the moment he bowed before his new dark overlord, Lyin’ Ted became Winning Ted in Trump’s view. At that moment, in the eyes of Trump, Cruz’s father was exonerated for being part of the plot to kill JFK. At that moment, Trump decided to no longer call Heidi Cruz ugly in public, although he reserved the right to still think she is.

The Trumps were in Houston to “help” Cruz in his Senate race against Democrat Beto O’Rourke, who could be the most exciting Senate candidate to ultimately lose. Let’s hope Democrats find something for him to do for a couple years until the next election.

Meanwhile, Cruz is running a campaign with this motto …

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A Picture is Worth 120 Indictments

~ Jim Flanigan

As seen on 60 Minutes, now hanging in the White House is this …

Republican Prez Pic

I guess they were out of the picture of dogs playing poker.

I really do think it is magnanimous of Donald Trump to display a painting of Alec Baldwin’s characterization of Trump. I mean, that can’t possibly be Trump, unless he has hidden about 60 pounds of flab behind him. Maybe that’s what his right arm is holding. If that is the case, poor Gerald Ford.

That picture represents 120 indictments and 89 prison sentences. I don’t expect that number to grow. Oh, you seem surprised. I mean, I don’t think Alec Baldwin or his people are going to get into enough trouble to generate indictments.

 

Mite Be Funny #88 – Special Kanye Gif Edition

~ Jim Flanigan

Mite Be Funny #88 Kanye

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Justice is a Fantasy

~ Jim Flanigan

I had planned on renaming my family league’s 0-5 winless fantasy football team this week  from the Baby Blimps …

Baby blimp

to the Losingest Losers of Loserville. I swear I have played fantasy football before, and even won the league last season. Whatever could be distracting me?

For the Losingest Losers of Loserville, I could have used this team logo …

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Well, Now What?

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 2 Comments

Now that Bart O’Kavanaugh has been confirmed to the US Supreme Court, I think we have learned a few things.

First, Republican Senator Lisa Murkowski deserves some respect. She listened to her constituents, and voted in a way to represent their wishes. I hear that useless bag of creepy skin filled with idiocy and oozing out word jumbles known as Sarah Palin is threatening to primary Murkowski in 2020. Newsflash! Murkowski was already primaried in the last Senate election in 2010 by her beloved Republican party, and she still won the general election as a freakin’ write-in candidate. Do you know how hard it is to spell Murkowski?

Q: What Democrat looks like a Republican, talks like a Republican, and votes like a Republican?

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RESIST! by Phone

~ Jim Flanigan

I received this Emergency Presidential Alert on my phone the other day. As if I needed an alert to know we have an emergency in the country surrounding the presidency.

Phone alert.JPG

I have resisted confirming it. I’m hoping that somewhere in the Trump administration, there is someone confused and concerned as to why I am not confirming receipt. RESIST! 

Fantasy Meets Reality

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 2 Comments

I decided to keep the Baby Blimps for one more week as the name and logo for my winless fantasy football team in my family’s league.

Baby blimp

Why? That’s an easy answer. I finally got to meet my team logo.

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Fece The Nation

~ Jim Flanigan

Caught on video recently was a plucky piece of toilet paper making a rare escape after encountering fecal matter.

Trump Toilet Paper.gif

 

Clearing The Hair

~ Jim Flanigan

After the latest expose from the New York Times on the Trump crime syndicate’s tax fraud and money laundering, I am convinced that we must continue to shine a light on and see through the Trump cover-ups.

Trump hair thin

And we should take a close look at any of his bald-faced lies.

Trump hair thin close

This specific cover-up is definitely wearing thin.

Trump’s Dirty Laundry Super Gif Special Edition

~ Jim Flanigan

The New York Times has certainly made a splash as they have exposed bare the Trump family’s tax fraud and money laundering through the decades. I am primarily familiar with money laundering thanks to the great TV series Breaking Bad.

Breaking Bad Costner

That’s a coincidence. I have an aunt who many years ago used to swear I looked just like Nicholas Cage. Let’s just say Cage has aged better since then thanks to a better trainer, better cosmetician, better tailor, better hairpiece (I use a scrap I cut out from an old burlap sack), and fewer kids. But that’s a story for another blog. Let’s get back to the Trump crime family and money laundering.

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Fantasy Flight

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 1 Comment

Last weekend I led my winless family fantasy football team into battle as the KavaNots.

Kavanot

This weekend, my team is still winless, but heading into week 4 with a new team name and logo …

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Invisible Glasses

~ Jim Flanigan

I am still scratching my head trying to figure out how all the Republican senators on the Judiciary Committee can turn their back on non-investigated sexual assault charges and vote to pass along SCOTUS nominee Brett Kavanaugh for a full Senate vote. Maybe it is because of the invisible glasses that Orrin Hatch wears that allows him to see the truth that we cannot see.

Hatch glasses.gif

Maybe it is because Lindsey Graham can’t imagine sexually assaulting a female. I wonder what kind of kompromat the Russians are holding over Graham’s head that have made him take such a 180 degree turn and become such a Trump toadie. Just look at the change …

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Stop Laughing at Us

~ Jim Flanigan

Hey World, stop laughing at us. We knew you’ve been doing it. We tried to ignore your titters and giggles at moments like this when Donald Trump showed off his tiny hands that could barely hold a bottle of water.

Trump drinking

Or when he looked directly at an eclipse with no eye protection.

eclipse no text

Or when the biggest cover-up in Washington, DC history gets exposed from time to time.

trump hair stairs

However, your sounds of mirth were often drowned out by your gasps of horror at times like these.

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