Jim’s Poetry Corner for a Circular Room

It’s oppressively cold here for the next week or so. What genius decided that this planet was habitable? Anyway, here’s a bit of poetry for the bitter cold. Feel free to add your own lines to create an even longer and more painful poem to read.

Winter’s grip of ice and cold is more than I can bear

As I rend my clothes in deep despair.

Now I sit shivering in my underwear,

Glad to not be completely bare,

And wishing I had even more body hair.

So I sally forth completely aware

That frostbite may require medical care.

But fear not for my general welfare,

For I awake and find it was just a nightmare.

Wait, no it’s not. It’s the freakin’ Arctic out there.

Bonus Content Alert

If you’re feeling lucky and want to risk extending this post beyond the poem and delve into the depths of Omaha, Nebraska winter weather and one-hit music wonders, then click to read more …

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My Plan to Lose Weight by Gaining Weight is Working!

When we last left our plucky dieter (me!), my diet plan for January & February was for me to gain 2 pounds each month in order to lose weight. You can read and try and make sense of that logic in the complete post HERE, but the gist is that it is inevitable that I will gain weight in the winter, so I need to control my weight gain, unlike in years past when I have inflated like a balloon at a kid’s birthday party by the end of winter.

That is me after most winters. Oh, but not this one. I planned to limit my weight gain which would allow me to start Spring weighing less than a year ago. After only gaining a pound in December, I planned to add 2 pounds each month in January and February. Then I could start March at 9 pounds less than last year. I lost 17 pounds in 2020 before the cold weather hit, so if I could lose just 15 additional pounds this year, I would be very happy at being down 24 total pounds from my peak in early 2020. Whew, I did not realize there would be math required with this post.

So, what did I do to only gain 2 pounds in January? Well, I exercised less. Take a look …

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The Big Chill

I was happy to return home last night after a quick business trip involving driving 600+ miles and staying overnight in a place where someone hung themselves. More on that tomorrow. I was eager to jump into our little pool and cool off a bit. The spirit was willing, but the flesh was weak. Instead, I jumped onto our couch for some TV watching.

But this morning, oh, that was going to be a different story. I was up early and ready to swim. I love those cool late summer mornings when steam rises from warmer lakes, ponds, and pools.

pool steam

The air was a crisp 62F (16.7C) this morning, so I found it odd that I didn’t see that steam rising from our little pool. I wasn’t sure why … until I got in.

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Short Answer

I see it all the time. I just saw it again today. A guy (it’s always a guy) wearing shorts in winter. Today it was below 0 degrees F. And he’s wearing shorts.

I’m torn. I’m not sure if if the guy is wearing shorts in winter to show how tough he is, or if he is just an idiot. Maybe I’m underestimating those guys. Maybe they are trying to be tough idiots. Maybe they are succeeding.

Inspired by Nature

I woke up to -9 degrees Fahrenheit this morning. I’m inspired to stay inside and not leave the house until June. For some reason, this winter pic reminds me of Paul Manafort and now Roger Stone.

icicles

 

It also inspired me to come up with an idea that could reopen the US government. What are the two words that could reopen the US government?

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A Broad Perspective on Winter Weather

We had delightful weather in December here in greater Chicagoland. The first half of January was okay, too. My 10 year old daughter was able to ride the bike she got for Christmas several times. We made it halfway through the winter months without much pain and suffering. I didn’t feel the need to use my magic sunshine light to counteract my Seasonal Affective Disorder.

SAD Lamp

I laughed. I made climate change jokes. I rejoiced … too soon. The fun is definitely over. Here’s where we are at now … Continue reading “A Broad Perspective on Winter Weather”

i thought my phone was broken this morning

Wow, catchy title to this blog post. It is so lame that I couldn’t bring myself to capitalize any words in the title, not even the personal pronoun. I can see why this blog was recently voted Most Likely to Suck at the 2017 Bloggie Awards. If the title of this blog post captured your imagination and curiosity, then you should get out more. But first, read on if you must.

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Cold Man Walking

I have lost weight this past year, about 10 pounds. Who knew that a combination of exercise and a sensible diet would result in weight loss? I still have 10 pounds to go, but they will have to wait until Spring as I prepare to face the upcoming gauntlet of holiday tables of gluttony with less exercise.

holiday buffet table

We are all fatter just from looking at that picture. I should just increase my exercise, but it looks like it may decrease. Here’s why.

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