Tag: political

I Can’t Speak Truth

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 3 Comments

Why can’t I speak Truth? Because they won’t let me into Truth Social, the latest Trump social media experiment. I missed Trump’s last social media experiment, a short-lived blog that lasted all of one month. My blog has (amazingly) lasted about 8000% longer. I think I did the math correct, but it’s not like you’re going to check. Anyway, there was no way I wanted to miss this new Trump social media foray. I signed up for the app, and received this message.

Ugh! That was a few days ago, and I am still locked out. Estimates are the end of March for the app to be fully functional. It reminds me of this famous Michael Keaton movie scene.

To be fair, the only reason I wanted to join is to leave a terrible review and then delete the app. Oh, and maybe leave as my Truth Social legacy a few virulent anti-Trump posts about him being a career criminal, and that would be speaking the truth.

Let Lying Trumpers Lie

~ Jim Flanigan

I’ve gone back and forth with friends debating whether or not we should make an attempt to reason with our relatives and friends who are hardcore MAGA Trumpers. Sure, we want our loved ones to see the error of their ways, but I have become convinced that trying to sway them is a lost cause. To support my argument, I present this video from a couple days ago.

Your eyes may have glazed over just a bit at the falsehoods flung around like feces in the monkey house at the zoo. Sounds like something crazy Aunt Jane or Uncle Joe at the holidays would say after getting into the spiked eggnog, but it perfectly supports why trying to show them their thinking is flawed is futile. First, take a look at the sheer volume of nonsense this woman spouted along with the truth listed underneath each.

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Top 5 Worst Judges to Replace Justice Breyer on the Supreme Court

~ Jim Flanigan

We all know the Top 3 Worst Judges to be added to the Supreme Court during the Trump Reich. How do we know them? They were appointed by Trump, confirmed by a Republican majority Senate, and are sitting on the Supreme Court today.

Gross. Typing that and seeing him makes me throw up a little in my mouth. The other two are as bad if not worse.

But now, President Uncle Joe gets to replace Justice Breyer. While there are many good candidates from which to choose, keep a watchful and wary eye open in case he goofs and decides to nominate any of these Top 5 Worst Judges to Replace Justice Breyer.

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Happy Birthday?

~ Jim Flanigan

I see that the county I live in, Kane County, will celebrate its 186th birthday this weekend.

From that pic they used, it looks 186. Then I saw on Facebook this shocking piece of news about who Kane County was named for.

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Freezing for Democracy

~ Jim Flanigan

I attended a rally for democracy yesterday on the anniversary of the January 6th Capitol insurrection. In the past, I blogged that rallying for voting rights was dumb, but having to rally to solicit support for democracy sounds even dumber to me. But there I was yesterday, in single digit cold temps, on a bridge with no feeling in my fingers or toes. Now those single digit temps were in Fahrenheit. In Celsius, it was around -12 or -13, which seems even colder to me. However, in Kelvin it was a balmy 260. I want to live in a Kelvin world NOW.

Anyhoo, we got plenty of support, but there were the usual middle fingers thrown our way and “Let’s go, Brandon” yells. Hey buddy, Brandon won. But the oddest comment was someone who yelled that democracy leads to communism. Is that the latest “logic” from Fox News?

I am a bit upset about my picture making the local newspaper. Take a look.

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Flies On Washington Walls #197 – Happy Anniversary?

~ Jim Flanigan

Mite Be Funny #254 – Christmas Gifts

~ Jim Flanigan
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A Gift For You

~ Jim Flanigan

A gift I just received this Christmas season has been a 24+ hour internet outage. I almost was unable to give you this gift, but then I went to the local public library to go online and post your gift. I know that you’re thinking, “An even nicer gift would have been no post today.” But it is Day 9 of the 12 Days of Blogging, so if I don’t gift you soon, you’re getting nothing, and plenty of it.

My award-winning book of 16 short stories was originally 18. But there was one story that just didn’t fit well with the rest, so I axed it. That left the story total at 17 … a prime number. My OCD immediately rejected that idea, so I cut another story to get to 16 … a perfect square number. Yes, I am an OCD math geek, a horrible combination if you a planning the guest list for a dinner party. Hey, watch me chew my bite of food the same number of times on each side of my mouth!

Anyway, the following story got cut from the book. Yes, the award-winning, well-reviewed book of short stories I wrote available for under a buck by clicking HERE. I have set-up the story on Amazon for you Kindle and Kindle app users. The price is set at $0.99, the same as my award-winning, well-reviewed, very inexpensive book of short stories. But you don’t have to pay that price for a story with just over 3000 words. Wait until Thursday morning, and the first thing to do when you arise is to click this link to get this short story for FREE. Well, maybe tinkle first and then order. And you should brush your teeth. That morning breath! Ugh!

Click this link to get my short story “Every Time a Bell Rings” for FREE Thursday morning. It is a holiday story, sort of a sequel to It’s a Wonderful Life, following Clarence the angel after the movie ends. Now I know some of you hate Amazon, so if you click to continue reading, the whole story follows, still for FREE. Is it a Christmas classic? More like classic sacrilege and blasphemy for fans of the movie. But hey, a classic something nonetheless. If you enjoy it, make sure to review it on Amazon. Now where the hell’s MY gift?

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International Man of Business

~ Jim Flanigan

I have enjoyed being involved in international business, both import and export, for many years now.

Working internationally with import-export has helped me realize that people the world over are just like me, trying to eke out a living and provide for their families. I wish those in the US who fear “furriners” could have a chance to interact more internationally. I think the US would be a less fearful and more accepting nation.

I export a bit to the Middle East these days. I have a wish for the New Year. One of my customers is a company in Saudi Arabia called Uranus Advanced Trading. I also export to a company in Bahrain that employs an individual who I want to go to work at Uranus Advanced Trading. Why? His name is Anil Titus. Yes, I want Anil Titus busy at Uranus. Yes, I am 10 years old.

And yes, I realize this post is not very Christmassy, but I promise I have a holiday gift for you in the next post as we continue to slog through my 12 Days of Blogging. A gift receipt will NOT be provided. Be nice and pretend to like it.

Repost of Yorn Yule Tune & All New 2021 Content

~ Jim Flanigan

As I find myself woefully unprepared for Christmas once again, I harken back to advice crooner Pete Yorn gave us 2 Christmases ago – calm the hell down. Read on.

Christmas can be a fun time, but also a very stressful time. There are gifts to buy, MAGA relatives to rub shoulders with, and decorations to put up outside often in less than ideal conditions. But Pete Yorn is back with some sage advice for this season.

Where’s Yorn been since he captivated us musically a decade ago with lyrical tales of his “Strange Condition?” Well, he’s been making music, but just not super memorable. This new tune from his 7th album may not be memorable, but it excellent advice to just calm the hell down.

If you aren’t calm after listening to that tune, then there’s something seriously wrong. Calm down. The gifts will get wrapped. The tree will be trimmed. You’ll get to go a-Wassailing, whatever that is. Ask Uncle George in his MAGA hat about his health. He won’t have time to talk about Trump. He’ll be too busy talking about his gout and the root canal he needs and the fried foods he can’t eat anymore because his cholesterol is too high and … well, you get the idea. When he’s done, just tell him to calm down because he looks great. Okay, that’s probably a lie. What is that spot on his head? But, what the hell, it’s the holidays. Maybe that Christmas lie will help him enjoy a Merry Christmas, like all of us will if we just calm down.

Continue reading for new content.

Continue reading “Repost of Yorn Yule Tune & All New 2021 Content” →

Flies On Washington Walls #196 – A Trumpy Christmas Wish

~ Jim Flanigan

Mite Be Funny #252 – A Life Beyond?

~ Jim Flanigan

Mite Be Funny #248 – A Matter of Taste

~ Jim Flanigan

Flies On Washington Walls #195 – A Bipartisan Cartoon

~ Jim Flanigan

It’s a Family Affair

~ Jim Flanigan

No, the title is not referring to Donald Trump’s creepy obsession with Ivanka.

Come on, who says that about their own child? I know I wouldn’t say that about any of my 3 daughters … except for the super-hot one!

All kidding aside (bad idea for a humor blog), I always wondered why Trump never attempted dating a Kennedy (and more importantly, all the Kennedy money) during the times he was between marriages. Now I think I know.

I was as perplexed as most everyone else as to why people gathered in Dallas at Dealey Plaza the other day waiting for JFK Jr to return. There were hundreds there from all over the country. Take a look.

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Flies On Washington Walls #194 – Halloween Canceled?

~ Jim Flanigan

Would You Like Math With Your Burger?

~ Jim Flanigan

A question has confounded me for the last 5 years. Can people really be dumb enough to support Donald Trump? I think I have my answer, thanks to a hamburger, which seems appropriate when speaking of Trump. Or, perhaps I should say hamberder. In case you have forgotten, click this link for a reminder of hamberder heaven.

Ah, memories. Anyway, the burger of which I speak is on the menu of a chain in the US called A&W, a franchise more famous for their root beer, which is undeniably awesome. There aren’t many A&W locations in Chicagoland, but there happens to be one about 15 minutes due south of my house. I rarely pass by without getting a root beer float.

It was the story of an A&W 1/3 pound burger meant to compete with the McDonald’s Quarter Pounder in the 1980s that gave me the answer to the Trump dilemma. I wasn’t familiar with the story until I saw this new A&W commercial.

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Republicans Saved Me From Embarrassment

~ Jim Flanigan

I had a morning coffee meeting with a local Republican government official this week. It was a beautiful morning, clear and crisp, so I decided to bike there. There was only one big problem … my masks are in my car. I was halfway there when I realized that I was maskless, and Illinois has an indoor mask mandate. Uh-oh. I began to consider what my Plan B and Plan C would be.

I decided Plan B would be for me to signal to my meeting buddy to come outside, order for me, and we’ll sit outside. Except, I couldn’t recall exactly what he looked like. That could be a problem. I knew he was an older white male. Shocker for a Republican.

Anyway, I felt like I needed a Plan C. It turned out to be this …

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Dumbest. Protests. Ever.

~ Jim Flanigan ~ 1 Comment

On 2 of the last 3 weekends, I have participated in dumb political rallies & marches. Three weekends ago, I spent untold seconds working on a sign, gathered with others on one of our local bridges, and rallied support to …

Voting rights. Of all things, freakin’ voting rights, guaranteed under the Constitution. Isn’t that the dumbest thing to have to rally for? Sure, we got some support, waves, and honks. But we also got plenty of thumbs down and middle fingers. How are they against voting rights? One guy with a bunch of cameras hanging around his neck (btw, who does that anymore when phones take such excellent pics?) loped past me mouth-breathing and muttering under his breath. As he passed my sign, he sputtered, “Protect the Constitution.” I politely reminded him that voting rights were protected by the Constitution and amendments to it. And then he was off. He told me that the voting rights bills that Democrats were trying to get passed into law would allow illegal aliens to vote. I assured him that neither of the main voting rights bills being considered would allow that and suggested he read the bills. He replied, “F#@%in’ Democrats.” That’s typically how it goes. Present the opposition with facts, and the obscenities start to fly.

One other interaction stood out. As a car drove by, the driver leaned out the window and yelled, “F#@%in’ Jews.” Profane and racist. Nice combo. If we were Jews, he needs to be more careful. Doesn’t he listen to fellow conservative conspiracy crackpot Marjorie Taylor Greene with her theory about Jews having space lasers that she claims started California wildfires? Maybe those space lasers can be focused to incinerate a passing car spewing obscenities. All I need to do is give my buddy George Soros a call to get some space laser action sent my way.

That rally was dumb enough. But then this past weekend, we rallied and marched for …

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Mite Be Funny #241 – Arizona Vote Recount

~ Jim Flanigan