I ran into a follower of this blog yesterday. Yes, you know who you are. It wasn’t awkward like the time I realized that the cashier at the grocery store was the same woman who I had been watching through her blinds doing Zumba. This follower and I have actually known each other for a couple decades now, and I doubt that she will seek a restraining order like old Zumba Hips eventually did.
However, the meeting was still shocking to me.
What shocked me was that she told me that she actually reads my blog, or at least reads the time-stamp of the emails she gets when I post another scintillating blog extravaganza. I was struck by the fact that someone is actually on the other end of these blog posts. People do read what I plagiarize, I mean “write” without attribution.
That realization got me thinking that I could do so much more in this space. I could supply inspirational messages that could change lives, rather than the snarky drivel and unending complaints, reminiscent of when I am served a house salad and the dressing is not on the side, that I typically deliver in this space. I could use this space to inspire others to greatness. Perhaps I could inspire someone to cure polio or end telemarketing robo-calls. Perhaps I could inspire youth of today to reach for the stars rather than reaching for the TV remote control or another tube of glue to sniff. Perhaps I could positively affect lives rather than offering easily-forgotten, at best mildly-amusing, and other hyphenated-superlative-described insect-related cartoons. (Editor’s Note: Mites are arachnids, not insects) Perhaps I should be using this space to build people up, rather than just taking repeated cheap shots at Donald Trump.
Nah. So a pervert, crook and spy walk into a bar. The bartender says, “What will you have Mr. Trump?”
And make sure to watch this space for a special Beyoncé-themed Mite Be Funny cartoon tomorrow.
There, that feels better. I’m pretty sure they are close to a cure for polio anyway. And did you know some of those robo-telemarketing calls are “smart calls” now that will actually provide answers to my questions like “What are you wearing now?” and “Have you ever taken a Zumba class?”