An Unbearable Game

If you didn’t get the hint from last Sunday’s critically acclaimed ignored Mite Be Funny cartoon, I went to the Chicago Bears football game. Not the kind of football where feet are primarily used to move the ball, but the American football where hands are mostly used to advance the ball, but feet are still used to run and kick occasionally. Wouldn’t that be a boring game if feet weren’t used to help score with the football?

Okay, I stand corrected. That looks interesting. Anyway, I went to the game and despite sitting in great seats thanks to a wealthy and generous friend, I have complaints. Now, I know it is not Festivus season yet, but I can’t stop myself from airing my grievances.

And who better to share my grievances with than you lucky blog followers who are glued to your screens as a captive audience? So, here we go …

Why do people get pilloried for taking a knee during the National Anthem when these knuckleheads holding the giant novelty flag won’t even remove their hats, despite the public address announcer telling everyone to remove their hats?

I count 13 with hats on, although a couple of them may be hatless but just have weird heads. And how about that guy circled in the lower left of the pic who decided to salute with his hat on?

I thought the Bears may be going full MAGA with what I mistook for the QAnon slogan on the scoreboard.

Thankfully, Where We Go One, We Go All doesn’t result in the WIPFLI acronyn, although I have no clue what WIPFLI is. Where I Proceed, Fraud Leads I? That’s the best I can do to make it somewhat Qish, and I don’t think their grammar is that bad.

When the Bears score, which tends to be rare this year, the fans stand and sing the Bears fight song. Lyrics are shown on the screens for the more inebriated fans to try to read. However, last Sunday was a day celebrating the local Latin community, so this is what we saw.

I hate to remind Bears management, but …

The halftime show was an excellent traditional display of music and movement by the 400+ member University of Illinois Fighting Illini marching band. Except maybe for these 2 guys …

Let’s take a closer look at those two circled guys who seemed to be wandering aimlessly across the field.

I’m not sure what instrument the guy on the left has strapped to his back, and I never saw the guy on the right play his blue drum even once.

During the game, I became obsessed with the idea of sitting in the farthest corners of the upper deck of Soldier Field rather than in the relative luxury of the covered United Club seats where I was. Why? I don’t have a clue. But I knew I had to explore sitting up here …

To add some perspective, my wife and I did see a game from close to the top of the 400 level before, just not in the far corner. The stairs are more like footholds to aid your ascent to your seats. When my wife and I went to the game, we arrived the day before, established our base camp in the 300 level section below, and left for our summit assault to our seats at 4AM on gameday. We were thrilled to finally make it to our seats 9+ hours later by halftime, but then we both had to immediately descend to use the washrooms.

Anyway, I did check for tickets to that remote section, and they are in the $100 apiece area. My family room with large screen television has never looked better.

PS: The Bears won.


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