Dumb as a Trump in Geography

I sometimes use the expression “dumb as a box of rocks” or “dumb as a bag of hammers.” I think we need a new one using the Trump family name. Is “dumb as a family of Trumps” sufficient? I like the rhyming sound of “box of rocks.” Maybe we can come up with something rhyming with Trump. Some ideas …

• Dumb as a chump named Trump
• Dumb as a trash dump of Trumps
• Dumb as a toxic waste dump of Trumps

We can ruminate on those. Regardless, I feel dumb as a Trump. I was thrilled to have booked my company’s first ever export order to the country of Lesotho. Now I knew Lesotho was in Africa, but I wasn’t sure if it is east or west coast. Neither! It is a land-locked country in the middle of South Africa.

OK, so I get a C- in geography for the day. Hey, I got the continent correct. But then I saw this and felt dumb as a chump named Trump.

There’s a country named Eswatini between Mozambique and South Africa? Really? This isn’t the imaginary country from Marvel’s Black Panther movie, is it? I’ve done import/export sales for decades and had no knowledge of a country named Eswatini. Dumb as a garbage dump of Trumps.

Even worse, we just sent an order to a long-time customer of ours on the island nation of Mauritius. I knew Mauritius is in the Indian Ocean. However, as I stared in disbelief at this country named Eswatini, I noticed Mauritius, nowhere close to where I thought it should be.

Missed it by a hemisphere. Dumb as a clump of Trumps. There, that has a good ring to it. I think I like that one the best. As for me, I best buy a globe.