In the wake of the Orlando massacre, the NRA is massaging and reworking its pro-gun message. Sources have leaked some themes that the NRA is considering for a new advertising campaign. I am only too happy to share them with you. My comments in ( ).
> Guns don’t kill people; radical Muslims kill people. (Nostalgic reworking of an old theme)
> Semi-automatic weapons are semi-safe. (Semi-insane)
> While gun control is an issue some people want to talk about, shouldn’t we be talking about our homeless veterans and all the jobs and housing the Muslim refugees are taking from our vets? (Should be magicians with this great use of misdirection)
> NRA … Now Really Awesomer! (Awesomest!)
> If you don’t take the responsibility and initiative to own a gun, you are responsible for the death of anyone killed with a gun that you could have protected by using that gun that you didn’t buy when you should have and therefore should be charged as an accessory to murder so go buy a gun today to keep from becoming a convicted murderer and rotting in prison on Death Row while your endless appeals through the courts delay the inevitability of you being put to death. (Best defense is a good offense and a run-on sentence)
> Mass shootings … thanks Obama. (Advertising doesn’t have to make sense and the NRA never does)
> You can’t spell “gun” without U! (Great way to establish that personal connection to guns)
> The Second Amendment … more fun than the First! (Hard to argue with this one)
If they ask me, I would personally suggest this one …
“NRA … protecting Second Amendment rights of mass shooters since 1871.”
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 
“Helping to create cold, dead hands for generations.”
“Anything can be used as a weapon (knife, car) but if you really want to kill a LOT of innocent people, get an assault rifle today! They’re designed for this sort of thing.”
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I don’t think you are capturing the whimsy of gun ownership that the NRA would like to emphasize, but I like them.
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