Mite Be Funny #215 – COVID Vaccination Time Multi-Panel Edition
Author: Jim Flanigan
Good & Bad Food News
As you know, rather than trying to gain weight to lose weight, I’m back to trying to lose weight to lose weight. I know, it’s complicated. Read the links. I was both encouraged and discouraged with the following food news.
FREE Donuts for Everyone?
This is really a shot to my weight loss bow. I love donuts as well as doughnuts. No matter how you spell them, I will eat them. Krispy Kreme is offering free donuts for the rest of 2021 to all those that are COVID-19 vaccinated. Take a look …
Continue reading “Good & Bad Food News”Hit Me with Your Best Shot!
Today’s blog title is a fun song along with my theme song from yesterday. I definitely got my best shot in a long time. I got my Fauci ouchie, Trump tonic, Biden booster, or whatever you want to call it based on your political leanings. I got the COVID vaccine, or at least shot #1 of 2. They gave me the brand that begins with a P. Now, what was that name again? Something like Placebo, I think. That’s why I’m smiling so much in this pic …
Continue reading “Hit Me with Your Best Shot!”Mite Be Funny #214 – Happy Spring!
Who’s Hiding My Pillow (Guy)?
Mike Lindell, the MyPillow guy and rabid Trump supporter, has apparently gone into hiding. He claims it is because of threats on his life. Methinks he is more likely hiding from process servers who have Dominion Voting Systems lawsuit papers for him.
If you have the stomach to recall, Lindell promised time after time to blow the lid off the 2020 election fraud and implicate Dominion Voting Systems. Except … he never did. He had lots of opportunities. He even made a movie about the election rigging. Except … the movie didn’t prove anything. It was full of spurious claims that Lindell swore he could prove. Except … he never did.
So, now he is keeping a low profile. Dominion had to hire a private investigator to locate crackpot attorney Sidney Powell to serve her with the lawsuit papers. Maybe they will have to do the same with Lindell.
Well, I’m down with Lindell hiding. It would be a feather in his cap to evade process servers that may blanket the area looking for him. I can’t play the role of comforter to him as I don’t like that he’s still in bed with Trump and that he continues to insist there was an election cover-up. That just foaments hate and unrest. It sounds like a bunch of sheet to me. And one last thing about pillows …
Happy St. Patrick’s Day
In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, here are my top 5 favorite songs with the word “green” in the title. No hyphenated green words in titles like “Green-Eyed Lady” by Sugarloaf allowed. No words with green as a part of them like “Greensleeves.” Just green. That’s it.
Song #5
I’m choosing the Lemon Pipers singing “Green Tambourine” at #5. It’s fun, poppy psychedelia. Watch the very cool old video.
Number 4 is dripping with soul.
Continue reading “Happy St. Patrick’s Day”Mite Be Funny #213 – Super Powers Multi-Panel Edition
Superheroes with Super Powers
I’m short on time these days because of being in an actual election race, but I did want to take time to point out some real-life superheroes with super powers. My wife works in education, so she is now fully vaccinated against COVID, which I believe makes her immortal. Now is probably a good time to consider canceling her unnecessary life insurance policy.
Teachers and support staff deserve it. They have been some of the superheroes on the front lines during this pandemic. But what about me? I want some super powers, too. I immediately thought about my ability to flare my nostrils. But once I cranked up the Google machine, I see others have this maybe not-so-super power, too.
I do like how his nostrils flare into sort of a heart shape. I would show you a gif of mine flaring, but nobody wants to see up my nostrils until I give them a good pruning. Unfortunately, my nose hair trimmer is a bit low on gas and oil these days.
But I did think of a super power I definitely have. That’s good considering I could win a quarter million dollars with it from the Center for Inquiry. That link gets you to their website page with lots of stories about the quarter mil challenge. So far, nobody has collected. But has anyone shown off this super power that I have?
Continue reading “Superheroes with Super Powers”Ice Ice Baby
Mite Be Funny #212
Flies On Washington Walls #192 – Return of the Flies in a Multi-Panel Trump Inauguration Day Special
I Was Wary of my Winter Weightloss Wish Working
And it didn’t, but I still succeeded … sort of. As I have explained in prior posts, I was pretty sure I would gain weight over the winter. The key for me was to try and limit that weight gain. By late summer of 2020, I had lost 17 pounds through spring and summer. As soon as cooler weather in early fall arrived and I took our pool down, I almost immediately added back 2 pounds. I went into the winter months of December through February hoping to minimize my weight gain. I wanted to show some progress from 2020 to 2021. It didn’t help that I could not bring myself to go to the health club all winter while a pandemic raged out of control in the US.
I was limited to walking outside, our treadmill, and our elliptical machine. I never got around to setting up a bike on a stationary trainer like I wanted. Mild winter weather allowed me to still walk outside in December and most of January, but then winter hit here with a vengance in February. We had about 3 weeks straight of incessant snow and frigid temps. I was relegated to shoveling/snowblowing outdoors when necessary (which seemed to be daily) and walking/ellipsing indoors. Take a look at how my steps in February shrank for the third month in a row …
Continue reading “I Was Wary of my Winter Weightloss Wish Working”Please Rise and Put Your Hands Over Your Ears for the National Anthem
I have a big day of blogging ahead for me as I reveal the final total of my winter weight gain in a post later today or tonight or tomorrow morning or whenever the hell I find the time to finish it. Stop rushing me! Before I start all my bloggishness, please join me in the National Anthem, as sung by Sailor Sabol at CPAC 2021, the right wing conservative conference, white supremacist meet & greet, and COVID super-spreader event. Feel free to put your hand over your heart, but I suggest you move both hands over your ears about halfway in as this Sailor encounters choppy waters (no relation to Muddy Waters).
Look, I can’t sing, but I am self-aware enough to know that I can’t sing. We’ve all seen those anthem videos when the singer forgets the words. We should have been so fortunate with Sailor. I wondered what key Sailor was singing in. It turns out – all of them.
This is the political party that wraps themselves in the American flag and claims to bleed red, white, and blue. If Republicans are so damn patriotic, get a good singer for the anthem at your events.
By the way, in exchange for the use of that YouTube video in this blog post, I am contractually obligated to mention that Sailor Sabol is available for bookings at weddings, bar and baht mitzvahs, and waterboardings.
Mite Be Funny #211 – Et Tu, Mite?
Mulch Ado About Nothing #11
I, Audio Dinosaur
I am an unapologetic audio dinosaur. I know my kids like to listen to what they want, when they want. Not me. Radio still tickles and tantalizes my audio antennae. It helps that I can easily listen to Chicago’s WXRT at 93.1FM, one of the great radio stations in the USA. Before you tune me out since you don’t live in Chicago, you can also listen to WXRT using the radio.com app on your PC, tablet, or phone. We can listen together!
Why do I prefer a live radio broadcast rather than using Spotify or another streaming app that allows me to listen to exactly what I want? I like to be surprised, and WXRT still surprises me. When I first started listening in the mid-70s, WXRT was an evening-only music station. During the daylight hours, the 93.1FM station featured Spanish language programming. But when darkness fell, the language changed to English with understated FM deejays spinning music on vinyl. And what music! They played progressive rock, jazz, blues, folk, and even classical.
Times have changed, and WXRT is now a slicker, corporately-owned music giant. Sure, they play some newer songs sometimes too much. But they play plenty of new music heard nowhere else and lots of old music, with always a surprise to lift my spirits. It may be rarities like The Polecats singing “Make a Circuit With Me” or “Belly of the Whale” by Burning Sensation. And I can’t help but smile if I happen to catch Perry Farrell’s dog kick off “Been Caught Stealing” by Jane’s Addiction on the radio when I’m in the car with the windows open on a warm, sunny day. I know I can play those songs anytime I want, but it always is a nice surprise and thoroughly gratifying when someone else who also appreciates those songs plays them for me. There’s a 3 or 4 minute bond that forms, as fleeting as it may be.
And then there are the WXRT special features like Sunday morning’s Breakfast with the Beatles, Saturday Morning Flashback, or new music on The Big Beat. I was moved to write this today as I listened to all-vinyl Friday. Vinyl album sides are being played in their entirety, taking me back in time to listen to some timeless music. I’ve already heard album sides from Bonnie Raitt, The Cars, CS&N, Billy Joel, Supertramp, and the Rolling Stones. I’m looking forward to hearing an upcoming album side from Chicago’s own John Prine who succumbed to Covid in 2020. To me, this is radio at its best, harkening back to the halcyon days of progressive rock radio when many a deejay may have put on a 20 minute long song by Yes so he or she could step outside for a couple smokes/tokes. And the hiss and pop from the vinyl is just so viscerally stimulating and satisfying for me to hear. I guess that not only makes me an audio dinosaur, but an analog audio dinosaur. I will gladly wear that title. Try and take that title from me at your own risk. I may hiss or pop at you.
Happy Belated Fake Holiday
I hate myself for missing another holiday, but I don’t blame myself. That’s right, I missed National Margarita Day. How can I be expected to remember a fake tropical drink holiday when there’s snow on the ground (not a euphemism)? I mean, there’s some effort required to prepare a margarita. It’s more work than me opening a beer and pouring it into a glass. Okay, just kidding about the glass. That doesn’t happen. If I’m going to the trouble to make a tropical drink to celebrate the holiday, I want to be able to make a BIG margarita.
Nice, but I’ve got my sights set on a REAL BIG margarita …
Continue reading “Happy Belated Fake Holiday”Mite Be Funny #210 – Boycott!
Can’tcun for Cruz
Once again, the crack invetigative team at JimFlanigan.com has uncovered the REAL reason Ted Cruz cut short his Cancun vacation. No, it wasn’t his concern for his Texas constituents. And it wasn’t concern for the family dog they left behind in a cold house. Was it that his wife Heidi didn’t want to spend time with him?
Ouch. Maybe. But I’m sure he wanted to spend some quality time with his kids. Let’s take a look …
Continue reading “Can’tcun for Cruz”Bully For Me
My bully is dead. Allow me to clarify. This was not my personal bully that carried out nefarious deeds at my behest. No, I’m going back quite a few years to my high school days. I was actually fortunate. I had 3 bullies to choose between to pick on me. And why not? I can’t really blame them. I was about 5’2″, barely over 100 lbs., and looked like about 10 years old as I entered 9th grade as a high school freshman. I was perfect bully bait. If I was bigger, I would have picked on myself.
I may overstate how much I got bullied. I never got beat up or seriously hurt, except maybe psychologically to the point where I have to work out my issues decades later through strange blog posts. But I do recall being called names, books knocked down, and a few uncomfortable headlocks.
By the time my 10 year high school reunion came around, I was a grown ass man almost a foot taller and many pounds heavier. Okay, I wasn’t heavily muscled, but I was in shape and carried myself well and confidently, especially after a couple beverages. I had my sights set for revenge on one of the bullies who was more of the name-caller and mental bully. I can’t recall how I knew he would be there, but I was gunning for him, without any guns, of course.
And then I saw him. He was not how I expected him to be. I almost immediately abandoned my plans to spill hot coffee on him. Here’s why …
Continue reading “Bully For Me”
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 