Can’tcun for Cruz

Once again, the crack invetigative team at has uncovered the REAL reason Ted Cruz cut short his Cancun vacation. No, it wasn’t his concern for his Texas constituents. And it wasn’t concern for the family dog they left behind in a cold house. Was it that his wife Heidi didn’t want to spend time with him?

Ouch. Maybe. But I’m sure he wanted to spend some quality time with his kids. Let’s take a look …

Okay, so maybe they didn’t want to spend time with him. But here’s what we uncovered as the main reason Cruz left Cancun early …

That’s right, rain is forecast for today and Saturday in Cancun. Cruz could have spent time in rainy weather in Cancun with a family that hates him, but instead he chose to come back to Texas to spend time in cold weather with constituents who hate him. I applaud his decision.

But why is Ted Cruz so hated? There are too many reasons to list in this post. Maybe because he didn’t help his former VP running mate Carly Fiorina when she fell off a stage after introducing him.

But make no mistake, Ted Cruz is hated, even by his Senate buddies. However, I do not endorse Lindsey Graham’s suggestion about murdering Ted Cruz at the 45 second mark in this video.

The one thing we can all agree on is that everyone hates Ted Cruz.

Thanks to graphic artist @Tarquin_Helmet for the featured image used on this post. Follow on Twitter.