Democrats don’t like to hear this, but Republicans are evolving and becoming better people. Oh, sure, there are those who will point to Marjorie Taylor Greene, George Santos, and Lauren Boebert as examples of Republicans regressing. Granted, they may be rough around the edges, but what guy can honestly say they wouldn’t want to go to the theater to see a show (and possibly more!) with BoBo? Maybe those three are just outliers, or perhaps more aptly termed outliars. But let me offer this recent Speaker of the House brouhaha as a perfect example of Republicans improving. I’ll explain.
Allow me first to do a Rachel Maddow and take you back a bit in history. The year is 1981 and Illinois welcomed a young white Republican to Springfield to serve in the Illinois House of Representatives after a 16 year career as a public high school teacher and wrestling coach. In 1986, Illinois got sick of him and sent him to Washington, DC to serve in the US House of Representatives. After 13 years in the US House, Hastert wrestled the gavel away from fellow Republican Newt Gingrich, and he held onto it until 2007. Hastert remains the longest serving Republican Speaker of the House in history.
I love Rachel Maddow, but at this point in her show I’ve lost interest and have moved on to watch reruns of The Office on Comedy Central. I suggest you do the same in this case. For those of you who are adverse to anyone telling them what to do, then read on. Or don’t. I’m not sure how to deal with you people.
Anyway, Hastert resigned as SOTH and from Congress in 2007 to become a lobbyist and make a fortune exerting his influence on his former legislative colleagues in Washington. But at least he reinvested the sketchy money he earned back into people. Specifically, the people who received money from Hastert were men who had been boys years before when he molested them while he was a HS teacher, wrestling coach, and Boy Scout volunteer. Hush money. There were all sorts of charges and civil lawsuits. The end result was that Hastert plead guilty to some of the financial charges, admitted molesting children, spent time in prison, was branded a serial child molester, and became a felon. Now that’s quite a resume when you add Speaker of the House on top of all that.
So, what’s my point? I’ve gone so Maddowy back through history that I’m not quite sure. Oh, right, Republican progress. Just look at Gym Jordan who Republicans nominated to be Speaker of the House. He was a college assistant wrestling coach at Ohio State University before entering politics. Hey, that’s definitely a step up from a high school wrestling coach. Progress! And while there was sexual abuse of wrestlers while Jordan was coaching at OSU, it wasn’t Jordan who was the sexual predator. Progress! And those atudent athletes who were molested weren’t minors. Progress! While there are allegations that Jordan knew of the abuse, it is also alleged that he turned a blind eye to it. Not only wasn’t he doing the molesting, but he didn’t even want to watch. Progress!
Maybe that’s too much progress for Republicans as it appears that Gym Jordan will not be our next SOTH. Perhaps Republicans need to turn to a member of the Unholy 3 mentioned above. Maybe BoBo SOTH? That sounds too much like a Star Wars character. How does George Santos as the next Speaker of the House grab you? Oh, wait, SOTH is already on serial liar George’s resume, and BoBo is much better at grabbing. That leaves MJT, and I think the best idea is to just leave her. But not in the House.
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 