I started this blog 4 years ago to become a better writer. I got derailed as the Trump Train careened wildly into the White House, and this blog devolved to a series of angry screeds, questionable memes, and mildly-amusing (at best) cartoons. I continued that cathartic path for the benefit of my mental health, yet somehow I did hone my writing skills. I have a non-fiction book that is 2/3 done, but also badly in need of a rewrite. I will get to that as soon as I finish a book of short story fiction which is about 1/2 done and looking good. And who wouldn’t want a Best of Mite Be Funny coffee table book?
Fine. You can put your hands down. Anyway, my editor/cousin convinced me to submit a short story for publication consideration to someone she knew compiling a book. I had to write about a picture that the publisher had published previously in one of her art books. I chose this beauty.
I received this email from the publisher a couple days ago …
Yay! The good news is that she will publish my drivel, arguably only suitable for self-publication on the Dark Web. The bad news is … well, there is multiple bad news. First, there is zero monetary compensation. Sure, I expect a movie adaptation shortly after publication, but nothing up front. That means more ramen noodles this autumn, and I’m keeping my fingers crossed for at least a free copy of the book.
Next, I have no idea what she means by “tighten up your story” and “punch it up more.” My editor/cousin doesn’t either, and she’s only been editing like 40+ years. If tightening it up means shortening it, then I think we can all agree that’s a good idea. Anything I write should be shortened down to the fewest possible words. If punching it up means adding humor, my editor/cousin has been teaching me for a couple years now to be less jokey when I write. And if you have read this blog, you will agree that humor is definitely on the decline. If I can’t figure it out, maybe I will just add a couple Dad jokes or knock-knock jokes as part of the character’s dialog and hope for the best.
So, will success spoil Jim Flanigan? We will likely never know.