I am a Ticket Whore

Oh sure, you could replace the word ‘ticket’ in the title with most any other word, and it would still be true, but for the past month, I have almost exclusively been a ticket whore. I have planned large-scale National Sales Meetings in the past for companies I have worked for, and that was challenging, but now I am asking people to pay their hard-earned money for an event on a Tuesday night that they could probably do without. Well, as long as I am whoring, here’s the event and you are all invited …

Fundraiser Pic

Maybe the problem is that the ad doesn’t show the location, date or time. Not to worry as that pic was just used in conjunction with a Facebook event that I have been sharing to all the local Democratic groups on Facebook where I have been shamelessly pleading, begging, cajoling and yes, even whoring for ticket sales. Hey, are you busy this Tuesday night? Do you like live music? Do you like free food? Do you like thoughtful political discussion? Do you want to see me do some stand-up comedy? That is assuming I actually write some jokes to use that I can find the courage to deliver. I expect to be a nervous, twitching mess …

rodney

It turns out that I came this close …

this-close-pinching-fingers

to getting the next Governor of Illinois, billionaire JB Pritzker to attend the event, but traffic from where he will be that day to where our event is taking place appeared too daunting to him. Shouldn’t billionaires be able to afford some sort of transporter device like on Star Trek?

star trek

Hey, no Republican Presidents allowed. This is a Democratic event.

Anyway, I hope to see you there this Tuesday. Can’t make it because maybe you live in Romania? No worries. More food for us. But buy a ticket anyway … please … I’m begging you … I’ll do anything … well, not that you pervert.

subliminal_animation

No it is not! There is nothing subliminal or nuanced about my plea. Use this link to BUY NOW!

Wait, I haven’t tried this approach yet. Buy now or this brave soldier gets it.

army man

 

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