After making my screen debut in 2022 and positively sizzling on the silver screen in such movie roles as bar patron, funeral mourner, and HS social studies teacher, there is no doubt that Hollywood has taken notice of my considerable acting skills and ability to eat an excessive share of the free refreshments set out for the actors and extras. It’s true that I have not yet received a nomination for an Oscar, Golden Globe, or even a People’s Choice Award, as if I would even accept a nomination for that last one. However, I know Hollywood has their eyes on me. How do I know? I received this invitation the other day.Continue reading “Hollywood Called But Got My Voicemail”
Hollywood Comes Calling
After launching my movie career as a hilarious comedy extra in a short film, and following that with a dramatic speaking role in a feature film, Hollywood can’t get enough of me. I recently was invited to read for a lead role in a film using a British accent. I can do a couple phrases in a Cockney accent, but a proper British accent eludes me. Oddly enough, I write in British English. As a couple examples, I always want to add a “u” to words like color, and I tend towards using towards rather than toward. See what I mean? My editor/cousin/godmother pointed those and others out to me as she edits my short stories. Could I be the reincarnation of Charles Dickens?
And I really have not had the time (or British accent) lately to pursue show biz. I’ve been much too busy at work and with the upcoming election. But Hollywood refuses to be denied my talents and continues recruiting me. I received this invitation today.Continue reading “Hollywood Comes Calling”
Goodbye Emmy, Hello Oscar
I’m not sure why my last post was sadder. Was it because I did not get an extra role in the Netflix series filming in my town this past week, or was it because I have a pathetic desire to get on television? Maybe both?
Well, I turned the page and snagged a movie role instead. Could there be an Oscar in my future? Definitely! I think Oscar is the name of the cameraman who will be filming the movie.
So, which movie? Here’s a synopsis.
And did I snag the lead role of old racist George?Continue reading “Goodbye Emmy, Hello Oscar”
When a star explodes, it is called a supernova and it is magnificent.
Editor’s Note: This is a conceptualization only. No actual stars were destroyed in the making of this blog post.
However, Donald Trump’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame was recently destroyed. Take a look …
Very Short Stories
I just finished the basics for what I consider my first proper short story. Sure, I’ve written a lot before including over 1000 posts here, but this is a real short story with words and not gifs, punctuation with proper use of apostrophes & parentheses, gerunds & infinitives, fictional characters that are not Donald Trump (we would be so lucky if Trump was a fictional character), a plot and not my usual rambling screed (which is where I sense this blog post is headed), and some meaning and message rather than the usual head-scratching jokey post.
So now what? I could publish it here and watch as one of my blog readers takes it and sells it to Hollywood as a major motion picture screenplay starring Chris Pratt and Scarlett Johannson. You greedy bastards. You would cut me out, wouldn’t you? Just for that, I have decided to do this instead …