Help Yourself

In the days leading up to the election, I didn’t do much self-care. Throw Halloween in the mix, and I was subsisting on chocolate and anxiety for over a week. I was just a bit on edge. When I lost a 7 team college football parlay because the overwhelmingly prohibitive favorite Penn State that I knew would win actually lost badly, this was the result …

I loved that hot tub, but the heater was shot and we can’t sell our house with a 20 year old hot or cold tub sitting out back. I can’t stay mad too much longer at Penn State, because Pennsylvania actually delivered the election victory to Joe Biden. Anyway, that demolition was a good way to help myself alleviate stress, which I needed since there was even more stress to come.

As the cherry on top, my dear friend and brother from another mother was diagnosed with colon cancer which he WILL easily beat if he knows what’s good for him. Okay, that didn’t make sense, but he’ll know what I mean.

With the election over and democracy having won, a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I can’t make my friend’s cancer disappear, but I can get checked myself. You see, I have also been lax about a colonoscopy. I am way overdue. Fortunately, our healthcare provider just coincidentally emailed me about getting a colon cancer check by mail for FREE. I immediately signed up, and received the stool sample kit this past weekend. However, there was a problem with the collection vial they sent me …

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Flies On Washington Walls #189 – Election Results Wrap-up Edition

For me personally, the best part of Joe Biden finally being declared the winner is that I will no longer have to charge my phone 4 or 5 times a day.

Songs for a Day of Counting Votes

As the election vote-counting drags on, I think we all would benefit from some relevant music to get through today. I know I need some. I still find myself openly weeping at times during the day, but as news for Biden has improved, I have made some progress. I no longer cry blood.

So, here are some songs that you may like. Let’s start off with a rollicking good tune about vote-counting in the Southeast. What city can help Biden pull off a surprise state flip? This one …

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It appears that my method to get Joe Biden more votes in Nevada, Wisconsin, and Michigan is to eat all the food in our house.

Who Votes For Trump?

This graph proves that literally it is a Dick move to vote for Trump.

The Day Has Arrived

I’m so nervous and full of anxiety that it is hard to put words together to post anything. But one of our flies from our occasionally posted and rarely funny Flies On Washington Walls cartoon wanted to offer a word of advice for today …

However, definitely do not vote for a third party candidate. I’m upset that this third party candidate is now in the race …

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Mite Be Funny #194 – Election Multi-Panel Special Edition

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A Great Pumpkin?

I’m so upset. I told my wife that we had pumpkins growing in the garden. I didn’t plant them. They just sprung up from seeds from old pumpkins I composted in the garden last Fall. I even showed her pics of the pumpkins growing so she wouldn’t throw our money away on buying pumpkins.

But still, she purchased pumpkins to place on our front porch for Fall decorations. What. A. Waste. I harvested the pumpkins from our garden and placed them in front of the ones my wife had so cavalierly purchased. Take a look. They look great.

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In Through the Out Door

I have a dear friend getting a colonoscopy and endoscopy this week on the same day. I’m concerned that they may do both scopes from opposite ends at the same time. What if the two scopes meet in the middle? What if the scopes meet and get tangled? What if my friend then has to have surgery to get the scopes untangled? What if the scopes meet, fall in love, and elope together to the gall bladder? I need answers to these questions, please. I am literally asking for a friend.

Trump COVID Plan

Finally, after all these months of anxiously waiting, we get Trump’s COVID plan. Honestly, I never thought we would get a comprehensive plan from the Trump administration to battle this deadly virus. Sometimes it seemed like they didn’t even take it seriously, like when Trump and his surrogates called it a hoax. Or when they hold super-spreader campaign rallies across the county. But it’s all good because … there’s finally a plan!

Go to https://trumpcovidplan.com/ Make sure to click on the Learn More link on the page to, well, learn more, duh!

Borat, Fall, and Email Scams

I enjoyed the new Borat movie called Borat Subsequent Moviefilm. It is not quite as crass as the original, and it has a sweet father-daughter relationship plot. It rips the top off right-wing American culture so we can see just how gross it is, in case we didn’t know already. I watched it on my Kindle as soon as it was available. But I wanted to see it in all its grandeur on a larger screen. So I headed to our basement where a slightly larger TV screen is available. It was there in our basement where I experienced fall.

Not the season fall, but this kind of fall …

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Great Success!

I want to announce that I will be unavailable for blogging on the 23rd of October. That is typically cause for celebration and great rejoicing. Why am I unavailable, you ask? Wait, what? You didn’t ask? You don’t care? Regardless, I will be busy on the 23rd. I will be occupied watching this over and over again …

That’s right, the sequel to Borat hits Amazon Prime on the 23rd. The reviews are in and generally positive. And you may have heard some news yesterday about this co-star in the movie.

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New Music for Old Rockers – RIP Edition

I haven’t done a NMFOR post in almost 4 months. Without live music, it sometimes seems to me that new music doesn’t exist. But it does! There’s some excellent new music being released. Here are some links to new music by Tame Imapala, My Morning Jacket, Bruce Springsteen, and Dayglow. Now the last song isn’t new. It was released over 2 years ago by a high school kid with a green screen, some musical talent, and the ability to write an easy, listenable song. Over 42 million YouTube views later and it finally is getting some radio airplay.

I want to make it clear – none of these artists have died. They are just examples of new music being made despite the Age of COVID.

That brings me to this new release of an old song written by someone taken from us by COVID – John Prine. Kurt Vile teamed with John Prine to record Prine’s “How Lucky.” I like the contrast between Vile’s clean vocals and Prine’s rough, cancer-scarred vocals that somehow still sound great. And together at the end of the song, their voices blend together magically.

It got me thinking about all the musicians we lost in 2020. I put together this supergroup …

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My wife whistles so much better than me, and that has got me feeling very conflicted. I am very proud of her whistling, but I also feel very emasculated by it. I know, I know, that’s so dumb. There are so many more and better reasons for me to feel emasculated.

Weight Until Spring

I tried. I really tried to reach my goal of 20 pounds lost before fall. But I’m solidly stuck at 17 down as the cold, wet weather has rolled in. I upped my daily steps in September to this daily average for the month …

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