Mask Mandate for my Masked Man-Date

I was invited to the Chicago Bears home opener this coming Sunday by a rich friend that takes pity on me from time to time and invites me to various sporting events to sit in very good seats and eat very good food. I was flattered by the man-date invite, but also torn and took a day to make the decision. On the one hand, I want to go to the game and don’t want the man-date invites to stop. On the other hand, COVID! I would be one of 60,000 plus people in Soldier Field in Chicago on Sunday. I really wasn’t sure of what to do.

I was leaning toward going, but maybe upgrading my choice of mask. There is now a mask mandate in Chicago, so I would need to mask up when I’m in enclosed areas at the stadium. I thought I should get one of the fancy N95 or KN95 masks for upgraded protection over my normal cloth or surgical mask.

I met a couple much less rich friends for brunch on the day I needed to make the decision about going. One of my friends told me that he went to two Chicago White Sox baseball games unmasked, and it was fine. Still, I felt I needed a sign, and boy, did I ever get one.

As we were walking in the parking lot, I looked down, and this is the sign I spotted.

That’s right … on the ground … in a sealed package … there was a KN95 mask. It was a sign from above, or actually below this time. I accepted the man-date invitation to go to the game.

But I got to thinking that I may look weird wearing a KN95 mask outside. Few others will wear masks outdoors. Then I saw a solution named Rilla while watching the Las Vegas Raiders on Monday Night Football. That’s Rilla as in Rilla the Gorilla, unofficial mascot/superfan of the Las Vegas Raiders.

Mask? Check! Problem solved! Dressed as a Chicago version of Rilla, I will be able to wear a mask outdoors and not look weird or stand out. Now, where can I rent a gorilla suit so I can conform to the mask mandate on my masked man-date?

A gorilla suit may be difficult to locate, but one thing that is always easy to find is my award-winning book of short stories.

Click this link to check out the reviews and buy it online.


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