I was just appointed to fill the open position of Democratic Precinct Committeeman  in the Township and Precinct of St. Charles 8. I was somewhat surprised since I was still awaiting to be scheduled for an interview for the position when this certificate arrived in the mail. Definitely no extreme vetting, but definitely suitable for extreme framing.

I am not sure how long I will serve in this capacity. It is an electable position, but if anyone would run against me in the next election, I will gladly allow them to run unopposed, although I can’t promise I won’t run a bit of a smear campaign first. I’ve always wanted to. I’m really just helping out until someone else wants to do it. I am honored to serve, and thrilled with having an official title. I see former politicians interviewed on CNN, and have noticed that long after they are no longer in office, they are still referred to by their former title …

• Governor Jones

• Senator Smith

• President Bush

• Democratic Precinct Committeeman in the Township and Precinct of St. Charles 8 Flanigan?

If this is my title for life, I may want to acronymize it a bit …

DPCITTAPOSC8 Flanigan. Yeah, that’s got a certain ring to it.