60 Minutes Commits Ratings Suicide
Tag: hillary clinton
Upstaging the Elephants
The time is nigh for the Democrats to show that a national nominating convention can be substantive and offer clear plans for the country, and not be a thinly-disguised WWE backstory of the feud between Terrible Trump and Killer Cruz. But I think if the Dems want to try and sway some on-the-fence Trump backers to vote Democratic, here are some suggestions to add a little pizzazz to their convention.
Hillary Taking Email Precautions
Hillary Clinton was relieved and contrite following the public FBI scolding she received this morning about her careless email practices.
Political Cookies
Happy Independence Day. I’d like to present some appropriate cookies to our politicians.
Bernie Sanders Concedes Nothing
Bernie Sanders has refused to concede his loss to Hillary Clinton for the Democratic Presidential Nomination.
Martin O’Malley’s Powers of Invisibility
Lincoln Chafee Quits Race
Lincoln Chafee announced he is leaving the Democratic presidential primary race. Twitter and facebook responded by not blowing up.
When reached for comment, both Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders asked, “Who?” Martin O’Malley, missing since he announced his candidacy, could not be located for comment.
Benghazi Hearings Infuriate Jim Webb
The House Benghazi committee hearings with Hillary Clinton are infuriating former Democratic presidential candidate Jim Webb. Webb was angered at receiving about 50% of the speaking time Hillary Clinton enjoyed during the first Democratic debate, prompting him to quit the Democratic primary race and ponder a run as an Independent. “It’s just not fair. If Hillary gets questioned about Benghazi, then I want my chance and equal time to be questioned about Benghazi,” ranted Webb.
First Democratic Debate Rocks Polls
In the wake of the first debate between the Democratic primary candidates, the polls reflect some significant changes and a new contender. Not too much changed at the top as Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders still lead the polls. Clinton polls extremely well with those wearing pants suits, getting approval from over 95% of that demographic. Sanders earned high marks from the “no original teeth” demographic, especially in the Northern states. Those in that demographic polled did complain that the debate was on too late, it conflicted with Matlock reruns, and the mashed potatoes at dinner were too lumpy. Sanders did not do so well in the “no original teeth” demographic in the South where that demographic cuts across all age groups.
Trump Miffed By Democratic Debate Snub
Donald Trump is making headlines again as he is reportedly upset about being left out of the first Democratic presidential debate. Trump blasted the Democrat’s decision to exclude him saying, “I was a registered Democrat for years and am a front-runner for President. I belong on that stage to take on Hillary, the old guy and the rest of the losers. Nobody can beat me this election. Nobody can beat me except me. I want the opportunity to beat myself.” I think most of America does.
Democrats Establish Ground Rules for First Presidential Debate
In an attempt to avoid the circus-like atmosphere at the Republican debates, the Democrats have established some ground rules for the first upcoming CNN debate between the Democratic candidates. Of the five Democratic candidates that have been invited to the debate, only two will be allowed to speak, poll leaders Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders. A spokesperson for the Democratic National Committee explained, “We want the leading candidates to be able to freely exchange ideas. We want the other candidates that are wasting their time and money not to waste ours and just butt out. But you know us liberals, we want to appear fair to everyone.” Continue reading “Democrats Establish Ground Rules for First Presidential Debate”
Jim Flanigan Looks at the World 