Is This Still Weightlifting?

I purchased a weight bench a few years back and enjoyed using it occasionally. After tough workouts, I have to admit I even took some enjoyment in kissing my glistening biceps. That may sound narcissistic, but the kissing was more for functional reasons than just my narcissism on display. Even my toughest weightlifting workouts didn’t get me sweating, either due to my superior physical conditioning or lack of real effort during the workout. You make the call. So I needed to moisten my biceps to get them to glisten in order to inspire wonder and awe among my family. Sloppily kissing my biceps seemed the easiest way to accomplish that. For the record, no wonder or awe was ever inspired. I was tossed a towel once since my biceps were dripping which I consider a moral victory.

The part of weightlifting I did not enjoy was changing the weights that my high school football playing son used and left on the bars every time I wanted to lift. Here is what the bar looked like when he was home.

From my calculations, there was more weight being lifted than on his body, but I guess that’s what football players do. He’s since left home to play college football and cut college classes, so the weight bench now looks like this for my workouts:

Oops, how’d that get in there? I am loathe to admit that the bench for my weightlifting workout actually looks like this:

You may notice something missing … weights. I’d like to provide some defense for my weightlifting bar looking so bare, but some would argue that based on the lack of weights on the bar, I couldn’t defend myself in a shoving contest with a preschooler. Well, I think I have proven that wrong several times. Anyway, the bar alone weighs 40 or 45 lbs. I can’t recall, and is it really that important once the weight gets that high?

I have attempted to add muscle and strength through weightlifting many times throughout my life. It has never worked, especially the muscle part, although I will lay claim to what some call “old man strength.” When there is a couch or refrigerator to be moved, the “old man strength” comes in handy and I can typically hold my own, as well as the couch or refrigerator. I want to be clear that this admission of “old man strength” does not give you the right to contact me through any method when you are planning to move.

So back to the question I have posed in the title … Is it still weightlifting if there are no weights? Despite the lack of weights, there is weight, so I’ll continue deluding myself that I am actually weightlifting.  I suppose I could add some weight to the bar.

But probably not without a spotter.