Time Travel

I have a plan to travel back in time.

Step 1 – Make TV my life. Fish in a barrel baby, fish in a barrel.

Step 2 – DVR a whole day’s worth of shows.

Step 3 – Watch that day’s worth of recorded shows the following day.

Step 4 – Do the previous day’s crossword puzzle.

Caution, I am a trained, semi-professional, paranormal, also known as a semi-normal. I do not recommend you try this yourself without professional assistance or a nutritious snack. If you decide to proceed, please heed these warnings while enjoying your snack.

WARNING – Do not answer the phone. If you do, it could be someone from the present day calling, and you will be caught in the past talking to someone in the present. That is what is called being caught in a fold of the space-time continuum and you will cease to exist, unless you have an alter-ego.

WARNING – Absolutely do not answer the door or pick-up your dry cleaning, especially without your ticket.

WARNING – Eat less red meat.

Remember, time travel is not for the faint of heart, but is OK for the faint of kidney and liver.

I will let you know how my time travel went. Oh wait, I already did … yesterday from the future. Boooooooooooom. What’s that you ask? The sound of your mind being blown.


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