Devin Intervention

Breaking News …

Chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, Devin Nunes, dismissed revelations that he briefed Donald Trump on new intelligence information regarding the Russian surveillance investigation before the information was even provided to his own intelligence committee. When confronted by our crack investigative team, Nunes clarified his position for us. “Look, this is no big deal. I play no favorites. When I get some new intelligence about Trump, I tell Trump. When I get some new intelligence about Putin, I tell Putin.”

If a Trump tweet has spelling errors, it must be authentic, right?

Trump Tweet Obama WMD

Brush-etta Anyone?

I checked the refrigerator to see what leftovers are available for lunch today …

Brush

I am not sure what is going on, but definitely not looking forward to lunch today.

Cooking Up a Better Budget

It appears that Meals on Wheels and the Corporation for Public Broadcasting may survive the new Trump budget plan, although in a new form. Both were originally identified as programs to have federal funding completely eliminated. Due to some creative thinking by leaders in both programs, it looks like they will merge and receive funding for the new …

Continue reading “Cooking Up a Better Budget”

Please call me by my full new name …

I was just appointed to fill the open position of Democratic Precinct Committeeman  in the Township and Precinct of St. Charles 8. I was somewhat surprised since I was still awaiting to be scheduled for an interview for the position when this certificate arrived in the mail. Definitely no extreme vetting, but definitely suitable for extreme framing.

Committeman

I am not sure how long I will serve in this capacity. It is an electable position, but if anyone would run against me in the next election, I will gladly allow them to run unopposed, although I can’t promise I won’t run a bit of a smear campaign first. I’ve always wanted to. I’m really just helping out until someone else wants to do it. I am honored to serve, and thrilled with having an official title. I see former politicians interviewed on CNN, and have noticed that long after they are no longer in office, they are still referred to by their former title …

  • Governor Jones

  • Senator Smith

  • President Bush

  • Democratic Precinct Committeeman in the Township and Precinct of St. Charles 8 Flanigan?

If this is my title for life, I may want to acronymize it a bit …

DPCITTAPOSC8 Flanigan. Yeah, that’s got a certain ring to it.

Trump Takes a Chancellor

BREAKING NEWS …

In his meeting today with German Chancellor Angela Merkel, Donald Trump showed incredible restraint and presidentialosity.

Continue reading “Trump Takes a Chancellor”

This Post is a Real Page Turner

I was very disappointed to see this sign outside of my youngest child’s elementary school  because I believe in excellence in education …

Continue reading “This Post is a Real Page Turner”

You’re Fired & Wiretapped!

Today Donald Trump clarified his claim of being “wiretapped” by President Obama by expanding the definition of wiretapping to include Obama watching Trump on The Apprentice.

 

Senate Dems Raise Trump Cabinet IQ

Trump Tweet Cabinet empty

Donald Trump should be thanking rather than verbally spanking Senate Democrats. Several of Trump’s confirmed Cabinet members actually have lower IQ’s than the empty Cabinet seats they filled. By delaying confirmation of the remaining Trump Cabinet nominees, Senate Democrats may be helping keep the average IQ of Trump’s Cabinet higher than if all seats were filled. Betsy DeVos, the only Cabinet member with an IQ in negative double digits, was available for comment, but unable to utter an intelligible sentence.

Don’t Fence Me In, But Do Wall Him In

After an intruder breached the White House fence overnight, Donald Trump has promised that Mexico will pay for a wall around the White House. I think Mexico (and the rest of the world) might actually agree to pay for it if the wall makes the White House as difficult to get out of as into.

CO2? Pruitt Doesn’t.

Head of the EPA Scott Pruitt weighed in yesterday on whether CO2 emissions are causing global warming, “I would not agree that it’s (CO2) a primary contributor to the global warming that we see.” This is contrary to the EPA website that declares, “Carbon dioxide is the primary greenhouse gas that is contributing to recent climate change.”

Pruitt shared additional thoughts on CO2. “This so-called ‘invisible’ gas is supposed to be accelerating climate change? How can a gas we can’t even see cause that? How can we even be sure that such an alleged gas that we cannot see and cannot smell even exists?”

Education Secretary Betsy DeVos responded by issuing a statement that she planned to do or say something really stupid to quickly regain the mantle of dumbest Trump Cabinet member. Although Pruitt really threw down the gauntlet with his CO2 position, we have complete confidence in Betsy.

AMA says AHCA not AOK

https://wire.ama-assn.org/ama-news/physicians-reject-house-aca-replacement-bill

Nice to see the AMA (American Medical Association) come out strongly against the Republican-backed AHCA bill as a replacement for the ACA.

Waiting, waiting, waiting for this …

Trump Tweet AMA